For The Love of God

2010-03-29T08:09:00.001+08:00

A good passage to reflect on as we move towards Good Friday and Easter. Just what is our role in God's larger plan of salvation?

2 Cor 5

The Ministry of Reconciliation

11 Therefore, knowing the fear of the Lord, we persuade others. But what we are is known to God, and I hope it is known also to your conscience. 12 We are not commending ourselves to you again but giving you cause to boast about us, so that you may be able to answer those who boast about outward appearance and not about what is in the heart. 13 For if we are beside ourselves, it is for God; if we are in our right mind, it is for you. 14 For the love of Christ controls us, because we have concluded this: that one has died for all, therefore all have died; 15 and he died for all, that those who live might no longer live for themselves but for him who for their sake died and was raised.

16 From now on, therefore, we regard no one according to the flesh. Even though we once regarded Christ according to the flesh, we regard him thus no longer. 17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. [14] The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. 18 All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; 19 that is, in Christ God was reconciling [15] the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation. 20 Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, God making his appeal through us. We implore you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God. 21 For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.

Re-blog!!

2010-03-28T11:28:00.001+08:00

Was reminded that my blog has been dormant for the longest time.
Inspired to write again, perhaps to chronicle my daily walk with God.
Let's see how long I'll last this time!!

Guess Who Won? :)

2008-03-21T00:00:00.005+08:00

Guess what? Our wedding photo won something in an international photo competition in Las Vegas!! :) Check out Bernard's (our photographer) blog at http://journalisticmoments.blogspot.com/2008/03/jump-for-joy.html

And while you are at it.. you see our photo up on DBS Credit Cards website as well... :)

http://www.dbs.com.sg/sg/personal/cards/promotions/wedding/gownsnphotography/

So cool right?!?

Its been a long time... :)

2008-02-13T13:35:00.002+08:00

Just sneaking in a post after a long while. Have been sitting at my office desk for a while now, wondering what I should do, where should I start.

2008 has been a whirlwind, and it feels like its gathering strength. Too many steep learning curves, esp. at the workplace. Multi-tasking and coping with stress has really taken on new meaning for me in the last few weeks. It feels as if everything is overflowing out of this small cup, and the tide just don't stop rising.

As I said, I'm sitting at my desk wondering what to do. I opened the bible, and this is what I read. Phillipians 4:4-7

'Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, whih transcends all understanding, will guard your heart and minds in Christ Jesus.'

Think I shall print this and put it up on my desk. :)

Face-off!!

2007-10-23T19:09:00.000+08:00

Y'know.. I have decided I don't really like facebook.

Its cute, its in some ways very helpful to know what's happening with a large network of friends, but it can get pretty superficial.

I haven't been on Facebook much, but from what I noticed, there's a lot of superpokes and vampires and cute animals and bloomin plants going around.

And because its so addictive and interactive, many have started face-booking, to the detriment of more reflective sharing on blogs.

Facebook is great for keeping in touch, for building relationships, but not so great in REALLY knowing someone. Do continue blogging ppl!!

I know I haven't blogged all that substantially, apologies on my part. Partly due to me adjusting to my work (yes, I'm new to working life!), partly due to wedding prep (house reno 60% done). ;p Will make an effort to share lives!!

Keep pluggin on my fellow brothers and sisters.. life is worth the living, just because He lives. :)

Excerpt from my student's essay, 'Describe a scene at a popular restaurant'

2007-10-09T16:32:00.000+08:00

This student was describing how a trip to a popular restaurant was turning into a real nightmare. Which is fine. But see what he writes in this following paragraph...

When my friends returned from the toilet, things only got worse. It started when I ordered a plate of seafood noodles but the waiter returned with seafood soup. Then came the not-so-funny jokes from Tom. First, Tom added a piece of fat into his plate and said, 'Waiter! Waiter! There is a worm on my plate!'. 'It's fat, sir', replied the waiter. 'I can see that', said Tom. 'Its eaten all the food, that's why its so fat!'. The waiter then got so angry he started beating Tom with the piece of fat.

Christian sharing in a Catholic school

2007-10-08T13:08:00.000+08:00

My school devotes 5 minutes each morning for the sharing of the Word, and for prayers. A teacher will lead each session with some devotional sharing from the bible, and to end with a prayer. All the teachers, staff and students will be listening in.

Fantastic isn't it? Best of all, all Christian teachers (Catholics and Protestants) are allowed to share.

I get my first chance to share tommorow. The theme this week is 'Seek first to understand, and then to be understood'.

I shall use our Lord Jesus Christ as the case study, example and role model for the students/staff to ponder over and to emulate.

Mark 10:45 'For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many."

Even Jesus Christ, our Lord, chose to die for us sinners, God's enemies. He is enthroned through his willing service to die for our sins, despite being our rightful king. He understood that our greatest need is to be saved, and willing provided himself as the solution. How do we lead our lives in light of that?

Heh heh... a glorious chance to share Christ and the gospel! :) With full support from my employers. :) Thank God, and do pray with me that I'll be wise with my words and actions.

Sample Essay (My Greatest Fear)

2007-10-08T13:06:00.000+08:00

Check out the ending to my student's essay...

'From then on, I believed in apparitions and beings from another world. I placed a picture of the Christian God Jesus Christ on my room wall and used musking tape to seal the door in the shape of a +. Suddenly, as though a miracle just happened, the floors stopped creaking, no noises were heard and the ghastly glow was gone. I guess finally the spirits were at rest, I prayed to Jesus that the trapdoor would now and forever be shut.'

Interesting... ;p

English Composition Guffaws

2007-10-05T13:19:00.000+08:00

Marking end of the year English exams papers now. A real torture, with almost 600 pieces of writings to grade. I sleep each night with a real big headache.

But there are its moments. Check out the below guffaws. Will add more when I come across them. Keeps me laughing and entertained. :)

1) The restaurant was so crowded that if you throw a handkerchief, it would cover many people.

2) When I was a litter child, my mudder used to told me…

3) I have a special skill. I can look into peoples eyes and see what they are thinking.. I got this skill one day in the cinema when there was a sudden flash during the advertisements. I intend to use this supernatural skill to fight justice… (Essay Title: Describe a skill you possess and how you intend to develop it)

4) On a sunny day, in the night, my neighbour Mr Fu and his wide shouting at each other... (so is it sunny or night???)

5) The hawker centre was so crowded and I got into an argument with students from XXX school over a sit. When I went home, I decided to complain to the Minister of the hawker centre to complain...

Fire Drill! *Shriiiilllll!!!!!!****

2007-09-25T22:11:00.000+08:00

We had fire drill in school today.

Was leading my really difficult class down the staircase. Imagine being a zookeeper leading monkeys (full sized apes), unleashed, out of a cage. It was something like that.

As we were going down the three flights of stairs, I felt moisture falling upon me time and again from above. Then I realised.

It was *spit*.

Students were spitting down the staircase, on the pretext of 'saving fire'.

GAWD.

Wah Lau.

What monkeys. ;p

I love my job!

2007-09-22T23:31:00.000+08:00

I love my job! :)

Yes, I do whine a little in the morning having to start work by 7.30, I do dread difficult classes and feel tired/weary at times. But each day I head home happy.. its really so fulfilling to connect with your students, and to be able to see tangible results .. e.g. them understanding previously daunting subjects or even better, seeing difficult students behave better after you have a personal talk with them.

I have been spending my time trying to know and build rapport with some particularly cheeky and 'difficult' students, but its been a great joy knowing them personally. I got to know many individuals from my 'hell class' now, and they really 'give you face' after you bother to care and talk to them and get to know them. Now they cooperate in class, and are gang leaders in getting others to behave. So cool right! Friday, I was heading to the class, and the entire class was already ready outside the classroom, chanting my name. Haha.. quite cute. Except it was a bit loud. Very loud. My HOD asked me after school what that was all about. Ahem.

So therefore, so far so good. Really enjoying myself, helping these young ones along. Pray for me to be a good Christian role model. Discovered a few like-minded colleagues, really thank God for that. Many students are extremely open to share their religious views/alignment in this school too, given its Catholic background, with the daily bible readings, sharings and praying. Pray for good wisdom for good conversations focused on the Lord!

Quite thankful that I am taking joy in the job.. for its quite taxing. I spend more than an hour at a stretch talking to some students individually at times, and this is in addition to lots of stuff to do... e.g. marking, preparing for next day's lessons, setting exam papers, bringing auditors around, School Excellence Model assessment, selling of flags, CCA etc etc. Thank God for sustaining me throughout, not just toiling through, but persevering with a smile. As if a reminder to take a break, my body suddenly broke down on Friday afternoon, as I suddenly caught a bad flu/headache/sorethroat.

So I'll be MIA this weekend. Need the rest. For another good week ahead. :)

Teacher! :)

2007-09-14T13:56:00.000+08:00

Its been a long time since I've updated. Been busy at school. Lots of ups and downs - entirely emotional job since I come into personal contact with so many young ones each day!

There's a particular class who really really gives me a big massive headache, cheeky and defiant. I actually dread it when my periods with the class approach. I say a lil prayer and psychologically prepare myself to be up to the task, be energetic, yet patient and not lose my cool. Challenging at times, but thank God for carrying me through.

This is the prayer I put on my desk, which I look at each day before my lessons:

The Teacher's Prayer.

I want to teach my students how
To live this life on earth
To face it struggles and its strife
And improve their worth.

Not just the lesson in a book
Or how the rivers flow
But how to choose the proper path
Where-ever they may go.

To understand eternal truth
And know the right from wrong -
And gather all the beauty of
A flower and a song.

For if I help the world to grow
In wisdom and in grace
Then I shall feel that I have won
And I have filled my place.

And so I ask your guidance God
That I may do my part
For character and confidence
And happiness of heart.
:)

Persevere all teachers, in whatever capacity, in which-ever school. :)

ORD Loh!! :)

2007-08-17T09:20:00.000+08:00

Self explanatory. :)

Am trotting down to CMPB now to collect my PINK IC.

This is one time when guys openly declare their love for the colour.

----------

About time as well.. I enlisted in 1999, FYI.

How do I feel? Stressed, haha, cos I have lesson plans to think of for my lessons from Monday onwards, and my reno's starting next week as well.

But heck, lemme enjoy this moment, ORD loh! :)

Church Camp: Good Reminder #6

2007-07-27T10:35:00.000+08:00

The Last Word - Matthew 28:1-20

I've listened to this sermon some time ago, haven't blogged about it.

Now, following the plight of the South Korean hostages in Afghanistan, the sermon further resonates.

Too easy to be too comfy in our positions, and forget that Jesus' last words ought to be our first priority. Pray God help BASIC, ARPC and me to always be mission focused and willing to take up the cross for the sake of the gospel.

Church Camp: Good Reminder #5

2007-07-09T18:32:00.000+08:00

The Reality of Judgement - Matthew 25:31-46

Woo hoo. This was one powerful sermon. The verses speak for themselves:

41"Then he will say to those on his left, 'Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. 42For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, 43I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.'

44"They also will answer, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?'

45"He will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.'

46"Then they will go away to eternal punishment, but the righteous to eternal life."

Whatever I do, or do not do for my brothers and sisters in Christ, I do or do not do for Christ.

BASIC ppl, heed that? ;p

Man.. these sermons really challenges!

Confusing... =S

2007-07-03T20:11:00.000+08:00

An update to those who's wondering what on earth I'm doing right now..

1) I have just finished studies in NIE. Awaiting graduation, 12th July.
2) Serving remainder of army term at Selarang.
3) Posted to Montfort Secondary. Tasked to teach English this year, Sec 1 -4.
4) First Day in Montfort: August 20th.

Ministry-wise...

1) TNYF and PUNJ have merged to become BASIC (Brothers and Sisters in Christ).
2) Advising the Publicity/Birthday Committee with Carilyn and Derek.
3) Missions training now, culminating in outreach event on 15th July.
4) We have an UCCF team visiting us at the moment too.

Oh yes, will be attending PTBC 13th - 15th July.

Exciting? Yup. But VERY confusing too. You should check out my email. I open my inbox with a liberal dose of dread each day... its easily overflowing. From multiple sources: tons from BASIC leaders, tons from the publicity comm, tons (TONS!!!) from Montfort, loose ends at NIE, army matters, PSC/Management Associate stuff to attend, quotations from renovation contractors etc etc.

AhhhHhhhHhhhHHHHHhhhhh!!!!

I have quite a few days of leave to clear before ORD. Am aiming to take leave every Monday. Why? I've been finding weekends so hectic these days (Sat afternoon clobs, Sunday at church, wedding prep), I hardly have time to be quiet with God and rest and reflect upon the week and to recharge.

Had a monday 'sabbath' yesterday. It was excellent. :) Just what I need... till I open my email inbox.. hahahaa!! :)

Church Camp: Good Reminder #4

2007-06-30T08:13:00.000+08:00

Resolving Tension Between Believers - Matthew 18:15-20

Gospel to all nations... but also the the family within.

Lord teach me discipline, sensitivity to sin, and let sin not be a barrier to my relationship with you and with your people.

Don't wanna grow up to be a grumpy old man full of grudges haha!! (listen to church camp sermon to understand..)

Church Camp: Good reminder #3

2007-06-27T09:56:00.000+08:00

Self Delusion - Matthew 7:24-27

Why is it so easy to be deluded, and choose the way of the foolish?

Indeed, which way do I often choose? At home? At work? With church?

Humilty or Pride?
Narrow or Wide?
Good Tree or Bad?
Wise Builder or Foolish?

Life or Death?

Deuteronomy 30:19-20
'This day I call heaven and earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live and that you may love the LORD your God, listen to his voice and hold fast to him. For the LORD is your life, and he will give you many years in the land he swore to give to your fathers, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob.'

Matthew 7:24 - 26
'Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock ... But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand.

Just like how as a teacher I hope my words are heard by my students, and that their actions change, Lord, help me hear and PUT INTO PRACTICE your words. I don't wanna merely listen...

Not just information, but transformation.
Not just challenged, but also change.
Not just hearing, but also adhering.

Church Camp: Good reminder #2

2007-06-26T10:29:00.002+08:00

Why Not Accumulate - Matthew 6:19-24

Monopoly money on earth is not transferable into heavenly currency.

Not the house that I buy, the sofa I covet, the riches of linen and the comfort of the thousand dollar mattress.

But loving those around me, consistent living and investment in the lives of people, earnest attempt to serve the Lord who made me.

Store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy...

Church Camp: Good reminder #1

2007-06-26T10:29:00.001+08:00

Love Your Enemies - Mathew 5:43-48

I'm not a muslim. But indeed, I live so little as a Christian, I ought to hang my head in shame.

To love my enemies, to love a gospel love, a humbled love borne out of gratitude for his saving grace.

Tougher and tougher as life gets more complicated, at work, in army again, dealing with difficult people from all walks of life.

Pray that I may be teachable and disciplined to live for Christ as my master, and not my own ways.

My Celebrity look-alikes.. and yes.. not surprising.. Yao Ming is there.

2007-06-12T15:11:00.000+08:00

GIving up our rights

2007-06-05T10:10:00.000+08:00

Singapore, and the modern world, is getting more and more affluent isn't it. Soaring property prices, record highs for the STI, peers around me purchasing cars as easily as any other purchase, living on credit as the norm admidst a bouyant atmosphere.

And we seem to be treating everything as perfectly within our rights. That we deserve every good thing that comes into our paths. Everyone gets it - wealth, health, bonuses, profits, blessings, friends, marriages - I deserve it too.

But is it just me, or do you notice too, in this bouyant time, an alarming increase in the number of elderly aunties / uncles rummaging through dustbins for empty aluminium cans to sell and make a basic living? I notice them almost everyday, at any hour, whether at hawker centres, bus-stops, shopping centres.

Just the other day, someone wrote into the forum complaining about such ppl 'stealing' cans from recycling bins, and calls with some disdain for measures to be taken to prevent more of such 'selfish' behaviour.

And I wonder. Are we a society growing out of touch with what is happening to the underclass? Are we too carried away with our rights in this bouyant time?

The talk in the papers these days are all about en-bloc sales, the size of wage increases, performance bonus packages.. all that we 'deserve'.

And perhaps with marriage preparations coming up, I am made more aware of all the material possesions that I am blessed with, and all that I can 'rightly' make claim of.

But a good reminder from the book of Job. Even when all is stripped away, Job worshipped God and said, 'Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked I will depart. The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised.'

A good reminder to all of us who are young and affluent - the LORD gives and takes away. Our lives belong to Him, his purposes we serve, and not our rights to claim.

Are we willing to give up what we think is rightfully ours, and appreciate the fact that the salvation Christ brings is more than sufficient?

To be blameless and upright, to fear God and shun evil - may God help us to desire for these more than any other selfish wants or 'needs'.

Touched! :)

2007-05-13T00:07:00.000+08:00

My first and only ever English class (3H) in Compassvale Secondary gave me a great surprise today as I left the school.

They drew me a card, and arranged a secret 'celebration' after school, with pizza, music with deejay friends from other classes, junk food and all. Haha.. and confetti too! :)

It was really sweet. And the words of encouragement from many in the class, whether written or said, really made my day. Happiest day ever in my teaching life! haha.. :)

This is especially so as I always found it hard to teach English, given its not my preferred teaching subject. Especially when I found 3H really tough to know in the beginning of my time of practicum.

But its all worth it, in hindsight. 3H did the miracle of making me think twice about dropping English as a teaching subject. Many shared that they actually enjoyed the classes, some told me they genuinely learnt and that their English improved. Nice.

'Teach. Do something fulfilling in your life.' Indeed, the sense of satisfaction is incredible. May the little seeds sown in teaching lead on the greater meaningful things in the lives of these young ones! And really.. thinking about it.. teaching language is not so bad after all. Not least the ability to equip young ones with the ability to handle the Word!

1 Corinthians 9:19-27

2007-04-29T09:38:00.000+08:00

These verses came to my mind as I balance others' expectations and demands recently - family issues, work politics etc. God help me do all things for your glory, to imitate Christ and serve you and others in a love you delight. I don't want to race aimlessly, help me depend on your guidance always even when its so tough. And to know that in your time and will, its all meaningful. For your sake, not ours.

1 Corinthians 9:19-27

19Though I am free and belong to no man, I make myself a slave to everyone, to win as many as possible. 20To the Jews I became like a Jew, to win the Jews. To those under the law I became like one under the law (though I myself am not under the law), so as to win those under the law. 21To those not having the law I became like one not having the law (though I am not free from God's law but am under Christ's law), so as to win those not having the law. 22To the weak I became weak, to win the weak. I have become all things to all men so that by all possible means I might save some. 23I do all this for the sake of the gospel, that I may share in its blessings.

24Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize.

25Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last; but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. 26Therefore I do not run like a man running aimlessly; I do not fight like a man beating the air. 27No, I beat my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize.

The OTHER Third Party.... =S

2007-04-29T09:26:00.000+08:00

Update

2007-04-18T11:55:00.000+08:00

In case you thought I've MIA-ed, here's a post.. :)

SCHOOL

Coping in school. Teaching's such an emotional job, with so many real human beings you deal with everyday. Some bring you joy, some anger, some even utter dejection as you question your entire self-worth and meaning in life. Haha. Exaggeration? Ask any teacher on a bad day. :)

I've shouted, I've joked, I've bellowed, I've cajoled. In some classes I try to be their friend, some I try to act hip and happening, some I'm a disciplinarian, some I just feel like giving up. On a good day I leave classes with a spring in my step, glad that they have learnt, happy that they were engaged. In others, I approach classes with a certain amount of dread, picturing the many toughies I have to face up and confront. Eating in class, plain chatty, dis-interest, attitude problems, utter disrespect, classmates rivalries, BGRs, so many issues to deal with. Most times i'm bogged with classroom and human management, rather than content teaching per se.

Practicum's ending soon. Learnt lots, hardened and awake now to impracticalities of over-idealism. But generally, a positive experience. The many lives you make a difference to, the many smiles you get walking along the corridors, 'Mr Pang!! hello!!!', those who change for the better, those who finally understand how to read a 6 figure grid reference. Nice.

Ministry

This one's a toughie. So many changes. Torn here and there everywhere. Unsettled mostly, tired of discussions generally. Its hard to pull away from human relationships that you've built, and when you ponder about changes, you fear leaving your comfort zone. Yet, the more you stress, the more you realise - be dependent on God, not yourself. God's the focus, not you.

And with beginning teaching, wedding prep, house searching and an unwell fiance to take care of, its really testing my ability to balance ministry and life. Well, I have always maintained that ministry (my encouragement of others in Jesus and the gospel) IS LIFE. But with the many commitments too, I am truly being tested of this conviction, as I consciously or unconsciously put ministry, and GASP, GOD, in the backseat. Jesus is the only thing, not just the priority. :)

Wedding Prep / House Search

Church Wedding: Bishan Salvation Army, 12pm, 15th December
Dinner Banquet: Legends Fort Canning, Outdoors, 7pm 16th December. Dressed for a outdoors jazzy dinner!
House Search: Made an offer. Crossing my fingers. Near MRT. 5rooms. Good view. Looking forward to it!!
Overarching thoughts: How to organise a wedding that glorifies God? What theme should we have? Wee SEng and Roger speaking. From the book of Ecclesiastes? Heh heh. Still in the works. But Evangelism is the key. :)

Others

Otherwise, been busy taking care of Carilyn too, post-ops (corrective jaw surgery). She's hardly eating, and for the last couple of days, vomitting whatever's injested. Swelling's down though, bruising almost gone. Still remember the days a week or 2 ago when she was in hospital, my heart just ached so much seeing the blood, bruising, swelling and pain. Thank God for healing, keep protecting her health.

And finally admidst all the business, just thankful for the times I spend with parents, chatting with them, discussing about house, about Carilyn, about wedding etc. Much more conversations though I'm constantly out of the house. Thank God, may there be opportunities to share Christ as we discuss important issues in life. Pray I will love them more self-lessly too.

Eh.. lots others to write actually. But haha, I need to mark my papers. :) Later!!

Consider it pure joy...

2007-03-28T21:14:00.000+08:00

James 1:2 - 18

Trials and Temptations

2Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. 4Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

Consider it pure joy... paradoxically, almost irrationally, the bible tells us to rejoice, in times of trials, in times of difficulties.

Yet what is the world's usual way of responding to trials? To grumble, to complain, to give up.

And don't we love to do it?

No, the bible says. Rejoice in trials. Persevere in it. Do not doubt, do not be deceived. God gives good things, trust in it. Things of this world fade away, but not his faithfulness and goodness.

Good reminders in this time when I stress about changes in work, in ministry, as I prepare for marriage. Do not allow trials to lead me to sin, but rather, to character building. Plug on, persevere. Radically so.

Don't believe? Check out Acts 5:40-42, Acts 16:22-25. How encouraging. :)

The Ring :)

2007-03-24T00:56:00.000+08:00

De-clutter

2007-03-22T08:52:00.000+08:00

In an effort to de-clutter, as life gets more and more hectic, here goes.

A new clean, fresh look for my blog.

No promises that I'd be more regular though.

But I'll try. :)

2007-02-24T08:44:00.000+08:00

Compassvale Secondary - First Take

I ventured into my first school,
Compassvale Secondary.
No, not as a student, you fool,
But as a teacher, essentially.

A 5 hour marathon staff meeting,
Complete with birthday, yusheng and the school camp briefing.
Met my CT, Principal, VP and others many,
Introduced to plenty, but can't remember any.

Scary all the talk about Action Research and ASPs.
But tickled I can't help but giggle quietly,
When the teacher-in-charge asked for staff
To partake the 'yusheng' and to fellowship.

2007-02-23T09:10:00.000+08:00

What we learnt in CLOBs today (Luke 15)

Man is obstinate.
When we sin its deliberate,
Our situation's desperate.
But thank God He's compassionate.

Rejoice at repentance.
For even the lost can get acceptance.
Do humble yourself and return to be his servant,
For in heaven there's joy and celebration.

2007-02-09T11:36:00.000+08:00

'Creative' Writing...

Haha.. We are asked to blog some of our reflections on being a Social Studies teacher.

Feeling rather more relaxed now that I'm a little more on schedule, and learning to let go of perfectionism, I decided to try my hand at some creative writing.

Oh and I loved the process. And man, I miss UK. I miss having time to sit and think and reflect and read and write and etc etc. Singapore's too hectic. Too many 'tasks', prioritise prioritise, easier said than done.

I need to build more meaningful relationships. Not multiple multiple relationships, but meaningful ones. Easier said than done too.

Esp when I'm quite jealous of my 'alone' time. With me, myself and God. And its hard to get enough of that when there's so many things to be done here in Singapore. But if its one lesson I've learnt so far in 2007 from reading Luke, there is nothing more important than reading His word, reflecting upon it, and obey it. And the rest will fall in place. :)

Below is what I wrote for my Social Studies blog... :)

2. Write an impressionistic sketch of what type of social studies teacher you will be (or hope to be)?

Haha.. A funky SS teacher I wanna be!

A dynamic SS teacher who challenges my students to think,

To ask more questions than give answers without a blink.

To say 'Yes, you've got a good point really',

More than 'No, the truth is actually.'

To bring newspaper articles to class and debunk its totalising myth,

To look together at political cartoons and laugh at its wit.

To engage the class in critically examining state policies,

And then to challenge them to think of better alternatives.

And if they can't for goodness sake think of better alternatives,

Get students appreciate the particular context a government is working with.

To develop students who can unabashedly say,

'I love Singapore...'

'But there is this and that we can do better and more.'

To have them wide-eyed and see the world beyond conventional truth claims,

To help them grow, mature and go beyond innocent thoughts ingrained.

'To see a world in a grain of sand,
And a heaven in a wild flower,
Hold infinity in the palm of your hand,
And eternity in an hour.'

To see for themselves that the world ain't simply what some paint it to to be,

And with that critical knowledge, know there is much more responsibility.

'It is right it should be so;
Man was made for joy and woe;
And when this we rightly know,
Thro' the world we safely go.'

Haha.. A funky SS teacher I wanna be.

Not a very good poet I know, but do show mercy.

I'll end off this piece now (Oh thank God! I hear you say for goodness sake)

With final words from Auguries of Innocence, William Blake.

'We are led to believe a lie
When we see not thro' the eye,
Which was born in a night to perish in a night,
When the soul slept in beams of light.

God appears, and God is light,
To those poor souls who dwell in night;
But does a human form display
To those who dwell in realms of day.'

2007-02-05T01:37:00.000+08:00

Martha and Mary

Today's sermon was on Martha and Mary again.. a passage I just led for clobs 2 weeks ago. It challenged me to search my heart on why I do ministry, and I'm glad that this time hearing God's words, I'm not so much stricken by guilt, but appreciating His moulding me to become more dependent on Him.

Too often I measure ministry with human measures - numbers, attendance, pat on the backs, visible external encouragement. When all is required is really a faithful dependent trust in His words to change lives - first my own, then others as I seek to teach it.

Too easily one can get disappointed when one goes by human measures alone. I get disappointed and affected really easily. Whether with one's flock, or with co-workers, or with people guiding you. And I do struggle with that. But teach me to trust in you alone God.

And on this note, I'm very encouraged with studying the bible with my PUNJ group. God, help us lead lives free from hypocrisy, may we hide nothing, may we live wholeheartedly for you, just for you. Deny ourselves and take up the cross. Tough, but help us persevere. :)

Which relationships matters most? The one with God, with our church family, with our kin, with our loved ones. Help us hold each other accountable to be close to you always. And may that give us full contentment in life.

Really thankful to have you, God. May this gladness translate to an active obedience to your words, and contentment to be right with you alone. And may that be enough and sufficient for me.

2007-01-19T12:36:00.000+08:00

'He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain that which he cannot lose'.

By some strange coincidence, I read/heard/chatted about the above quote from Jim Elliot over 3 different circumstances over the last 2 days.

This is a man who gave up his life doing missions in Ecuador in the 1950s. He was trying to reach the Aucas, a violent tribe, with the gospel. There with four of his mates from Wheaton (top Christian college of the time), he met his death when a tribe of 10 attacked them.

One will think that perscution will cripple a church, will cripple the will of man to venture for the gospel of God. But precisely.

So often we forget that the gospel is God's, the mission is His. In the 20 years after Jim Elliot's demise, Wheaton College had record numbers venturing overseas to do missions, undeterred by the violent death of Elliot and friends. What about the Aucas? Elisabeth Elliot, Jim's wife, went back to the tribe in Ecuador with other missionaries, and began working among the Auca (Huaorani) Indians, where they had a profound impact and won many converts. An entire village, I heard, turned to Christ.

'He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain that which he cannot lose'.

Persevere brothers and sisters, let's keep our eyes on what is important in this world, keep being faithful to His gospel, trust in His faithfulness, and embark on His mission. His grace is all sufficient, His power in the gospel awesome.

My verse for the year.. 1 Cor 16:13-14 'Be watchful, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong. Let all that you do be done in love.'

Gastroenteritis

2007-01-03T11:12:00.000+08:00

Gastroenteritis (n)

Pronunciation: "gas-trO-"en-t&-'rI-t&s"

Gastroenteritis refers to the noninflammatory infection of the upper small bowel, or inflammatory infection of the colon, both part of the gastrointestinal tract.

It usually is of acute onset, normally lasting less than 10 days and self-limiting. Sometimes it is referred to simply as 'gastro'. It is often called the stomach flu or gastric flu even though it is not related to influenza.

Also the infection that has rendered the beginning of keeevin's 2007 less enjoyable than it could have been. Injestion of liquids an impossibly vulgar notion, and only dry breads and biscuits of any appetising attraction to the normally greedy keeev. Paucity in water intake has resulted in huge ulcer growth in lower lip.

1 Thes 5:16-18

'Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.'

Hee.. :) Happy New Year to all!! :) Despite "gas-trO-"en-t&-'rI-t&s", I'm feeling upbeat. 'Jesus loves you.. its gonna be a great year ahead!' :)

P/S.. If you are wondering why I'm down with "gas-trO-"en-t&-'rI-t&s", the below pictures may give you an indication. :) More photos from Japan soon.

Happy New Year!!

2007-01-01T12:24:00.000+08:00

Happy New Year~!

Wow, its fast, 2006 has come and gone.

Much has happened over the past year, many events so fresh, it feels as if 2006’s been condensed into a day.

It’s a year where I learnt most about myself, about my weaknesses, my vulnerabilities, my pride. It’s a year full of struggles as I got to grips with my humanity, my identity in Christ, of standing firm in army, of my new vocation as a trainee-teacher, of the impending challenge of being a household breadwinner, of learning to trust in Him and not myself in ministry, of being in a relationship, out of it, hardened to it, but yet led back amazed into another. Its been emotionally and physically draining. I ended the year ill yesterday at the countdown, nauseous, head aching and spinning, body aches. But yet there is much to give thanks for, and on this day, 01-01-07, I can only look back, humbled and thankful.

Earlier in the year, I couldn’t wait to be out of army, as it was pretty tough being the only Christian in the office. Stranger in the world never took on a more real meaning. Surprisingly (or I should’ve known), entering NIE wasn’t that much better. The realism of this world is the pursuit of many things self-centred in nature. You see human sinfulness everywhere, you see selfishness even in NIE, you see the operation of a lost world in work. Deadlines after deadlines, it was packed and you question the whole system and the values lost in it.

Ministry had its ups and downs, and I shall not rehash too much. Suffice to say, I have been utterly humbled this year, to trust and depend on Him, and not on my own credentials and abilities. Trust and be faithful, that is the only important thing. Teach me Lord to appreciate your work in the gospel day by day.

Relationships-wise, I grew wiser as I saw things from the other perspective, being the one who has been self-centred, taking the other party for granted, being unable to commit. It was a terrible guilt-trip, and I knew I had to be true and not lead anyone else on any further. It was a lesson in the importance of being contented in Him, and not in relationships per se.

Mismatched expectations. Those are probably the two words I would sum 2006 up to be. In army, at NIE, ministry and relationships – too many mismatched expectations served to wear me down, physically and emotionally. Have never felt more burnt out in my life, whether in a search to meet up to my own expectations, or worse, and more pertinently so, to live up to others. I was genuinely sick of living up to an identity of what others make me out to be, and had to take a step back and consolidate.

And I’m glad that each time I’m worn down by these mismatched expectations, I’m being led closer to Him, to realize that the only important thing is my identity in Christ. I was made to learn how to take comfort in Him, to marvel at His provisions for me. Thank God for the fellow bro+sis in Christ in NIE, also for brothers like LC and Roger. Through the encouraging words, or simply the faithful life they lead, they really helped to point me to Christ at times when I felt lost. Thank God for the many encouragements in PUNJ, for the word changing lives, it felt so humbling and wonderful seeing some of the young ones reveling in your gospel at bible studies and at PUNJ/Church camp. Its not about me, its about you Lord. God taught me to appreciate my parents more this year, and not to take them and their salvation for granted, as I witnessed the pain Pastor Sim and also my bro WJ had with the passing of their Dad(s). God taught me to trust in His guidance in life, and not in my own plans and schemes, as He provided me abundantly with His love, His people, my family, Carilyn. Many a times I felt worn down by my pursuit of perfection in my relationships with people, with my work, with my family, with ministry. Self-imposed or meeting up to others’ expectations, it doesn’t quite matter. When quite simply, the only way round ought to be simply the imitation of Him, ‘as dearly loved children, to live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God’ (Ephesians 5:1-2) Teach me to appreciate that day by day Lord. Let your son Jesus Christ guide my life always, and his sacrifice on the cross my only motivation to live a life of love. To become more like you. A life worthy and pleasing to you, and not anyone else.

May 2007 be all about you, Jesus Christ. And I’m glad to say I’m genuinely excited.

2006-12-13T21:14:00.000+08:00

Congratulations Lichuan and Huiling!!

Been busy with PUNJ camp which starts tommorow, and also with helping our dearest brother Li Chuan and sister Huiling for their wedding. Above is a picture at the church wedding. Nice eh? :)

Carilyn and I are just so glad things turn out well, and man, did we get a scare when we thought we lost your guestbook! But phew, thank God. :)

Will update once PUNJ camp is over. Meanwhile, pray for a good helpful camp, with lots of good bible teaching, meaningful deep conversations, good fellowship. :)

Till later...

2006-11-16T18:02:00.000+08:00

Acappella - You Are God Alone (a cappella)

Ok.. Next time my group lead songs for PUNJ, we are singing like that... :)

2006-11-13T21:59:00.000+08:00

Stress and Burnout

Okay, I have got a few deadlines and assignments hanging over my neck, but think this post is more important. I own plenty of people an update about myself, and I do desire your prayers too. Work can wait.. :)

Just had a weekend retreat with the PUNJ leaders, and a major theme we looked at was pressures and stress in ministry, and the need for us to last the race. Roger organized it in such a way that we had much time to reflect, to share and to pray for one another. It was a good time just pausing to ponder about the essentials in life again, and a good time to review ourselves. And thank God, am I glad. I knew this sub-consciously for some time, Carilyn's pointed out these things to me in various ways for a while now, but I have not actually acknowledged it. Upon reflections, I must admit I am showing quite a few symptoms of stress and burnout and really ought to pause and get my priorities right.

NIE has been very hectic over the last couple of months. Deadline after deadline, week after week. I mean, just take the week before the leaders retreat for example. I was literally slogging out every free minute of my time just so I can complete my work before schedule and have a stress free weekend. Group projects, GESL community service thing, and the whole 1.5 hours travel each way just kills. But these are ok, the work has not exactly been very challenging, so I am not actually stressed with the assignments per se except with time management across multiple realms. There are many people I want to spend time with - my family, Carilyn, PUNJ leaders, friends in NIE and more, and ministry wise there's lots to ponder about. All these leads to added stress, so oh man, I can't wait for term to end. :)

Ministry has not been exactly uplifting, with many of my PUNJers not coming due to exams or other reasons. Being co-camp commandant for PUNJ camp adds another dimension of stress, and it is pretty discouraging with the lukewarm response so far. There are many people I want to catch up, read the bible and pray with, especially my dear WJ and SX who just returned from overseas, there are many overseas I want to write to encourage, or simply ppl within PUNJ I have not had time to meet up. But increasingly with all the stress from managing my time, I find myself going through ministry with some drudge and dread, that it becomes almost something of a duty and a chore. QT suffers, prayer-life suffers, and meeting with people and just chatting becomes depersonalized and a dreaded 'responsibility' to dispense with. And you begin to feel disengaged with ministry and end up doing just what is required without putting your heart into it. And find yourself 'switched off'. But self-driven keeev just keeps trudging on, thinking he ought to be the one to settle it all by himself, being responsible for it all. The control freak perfectionist keeev slogs on through his busy schedule, but really, where's the joy? The focus? The motivation?

Time really has been a rare commodity over the last few weeks, and I have to picture in my head each morning on the MRT how each hour of my day should pan out, and how the rest of the week can structure itself. Every single hour of the day is spent on completing some assignment, planning something for ministry, preparing bible study, meeting up with some groups to discuss some project etc. It doesn't help that my body has been tuned to (very) regular exercise in the early days of NIE, and now that I don’t get it, I get frustrated and emotionally messed up easily. For someone who's been really overweight and is constantly watching his diet, I get overly obsessive about my food and exercise, and it just adds another dimension of unhealthy stress. Personality-wise, I always feel very personally responsible for my work, and try in most earnestness to be diligent with assignments. Try as I might, I cannot really put in anything less than my perfectionist effort.. and that is stressful haha, especially when you need to balance your time in multiple different areas. Ministry wise, when discouraging times come, I feel personally responsible and guilty. I know Christ died for all, and it is in God's hands, but I find it hard to entirely fall upon and be dependent on Him, trusting entirely that it is ultimately His work, not ours. It is not as if I am trying to earn my salvation. Rather, I feel so deeply indebted to Christ that I feel that I am always not doing enough. Being quite a perfectionist and control freak, I feel personally responsible in ministry for all the discouragements, and a vicious cycle just go on and on, as I lose sight of the real motivation in serving Him and His kingdom. It almost becomes something to do with personal achievement, and in living up to other people's expectations, to my own expectations.

So it has been a good weekend to restock and to remind myself again that it is all for Him, not about myself. Thank God really, thanks Roger, it was His words expounded with very good timing. Carilyn's been great too in pointing out my unhealthy compulsive seek for structure and perfection, with my obsessive need for exercise and diet, with my lack of dependence on Him, with my lack of self care with regards to Sabbath rest and in reminding me that I really ought to pray more. It has been a good weekend to realize that I need to practice more self-care, in taking breaks once in a while, to last the long race, and not be too myopic and run myself to the ground in the short term. I ought to take good care of my spiritual health, to be thirsting for His words, to find time in building my own relationship with Him, before I seek to serve and love others in ministry and more. It feels good already realizing it, and being aware of my own weaknesses, skewed priorities and vulnerabilities. QT this morning was refreshing and His words alive again. Pray I always delight in reading His words, to fix my eyes upon Jesus, and to stand firm in my relationship with God. With that, everything will fall into place just right. I will learn to re-prioritise, to let go, to lean upon Him for strength, and to trust in His sovereign hand in all.

Thanks all for reading so far, and for praying. There really is nothing more important than that. :)

Hebrews 12:1-3:

'Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set out before him endured the cross, scorning his shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.'

2006-10-26T20:32:00.000+08:00

Dick and Rick Hoyt

We were shown this video during Educational Psychology class in NIE. Quite touching. This father and son team has competed in 206 triathalons and 6 ironmans admidst other races, to gather funds for the integration and inclusion of disabled into everyday life.

I was surprised also by the video's choice of music, Mercy Me's 'I Can Only Imagine.' A christian song! My head immediately thought of the book of Luke which we are studying at PUNJ now. Jesus said:

Luke 4:18 - 19
'The Spirit of the Lord is on me, because he has appointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners, and recovery of sight for the blind, to release the oppressed, to proclaim the year of the Lord's favour.'

Also in Luke, chapter 7:22, Jesus said:

'Go back and report to John what you have seen and heard: The blind receive sight, the lame walk, those who have leprosy are cured, the deaf hear, the dead are raised, and the good news is preached to the poor. Blessed is the man who does not fall away on account of me.'

Jesus came to earth with a message, a message of great hope, that he came to offer freedom and liberation for all. He died for all, and his offer of salvation is unlimited and extended to everyone - there is no outcaste, no discrimination in the Kingdom of God he ushers.

Many of us christians fail to live out this great message of unselfish love, to include people out of our comfort zones. But take nothing away from the faithfulness and love of God, most evidently displayed by Jesus' selfless death on the cross to take the punishment we deserve. We christians should seek to grow in Christlikeness in how we love and reach out to others, and also point people to the certain hope that one day, God wil sit on the throne, wiping away every tear, never again will anyone hunger, nor will anyone thirst. In Christ we have all that we need.

I can only imagine...

2006-10-23T08:42:00.000+08:00

Singlish Security Lecture at ICS

Haha.. Look at what our international students in Singapore can do to spoof us.

Sorry guys I know I haven't blogged much, very busy lately with multiple deadlines at NIE. I blog on another site fortheloveofgeography.blogspot.com, its for my course, but its hardly the same I know. Will put up some update soon :)

2006-10-16T23:12:00.000+08:00

Change of Number

To those who are reading this, I have changed my mobile number.

Left my phone in a cab a couple of weeks ago, so I got myself a new contract and line.

I lost all my contacts along with the phone... so its a lil tough for me. If you are reading this, and have no idea what my new number is, please drop me an email.

cheers!

2006-10-10T21:05:00.000+08:00

What Geographers Learn in NIE

For those of you who wonder what we study in NIE - this is it. :)

2006-09-25T10:58:00.000+08:00

BB Tuition Update..

Its so cool, got to share the gospel with the boy I'm tuitioning again. This time round, we were reading a comprehension passage on 'World Peace', and how its an 'impossible dream', given all the selfish desires and ideologies of different peoples and religions of this world.

What can I do but highlight the parallel in this description of the world, as that by God (and Paul) in Romans 1-3? I know its pretty 'cheem' for a sec 2 kid, but he was quite excited how a text written 2000 years ago is so similar to one written in his exam paper. And could see his eyes round and bright with wonder as I shared how peace is possible only through Christ. :) So cool. I think he's really open to the gospel, and in many senses, is willing to submit himself to God and accept His grace in his life. :) Wow wee.. :)

Tuition after a long day in church is tiring, but its such a joy. :)

2006-09-13T21:30:00.000+08:00

Boys Brigade Tuition Ministry

Just wanna blog this down before I forget. Its really encouraging to me and much to give thanks for.

For those in the know, ARPC has begun a Boys / Girls Brigade tuition ministry, where volunteers from the church will offer to give free tuition to the boys and girls who needs help in their various subjects.

So on Sunday, I went along and tutored two boys in Geography and English. It was really cool in a sense to put what I learnt in NIE in action, and it was quite fulfilling to see the first boy understanding the geography concepts of map reading I was teaching.

But what was more encouraging was what followed. The second boy I tutored wrote an English essay entitled 'My Sadness'. He wrote pretty candidly on how sad he was to witness his uncle's passing away a few months back. Honestly speaking, the English for the essay was bad. The grammar, structure and vocabulary employed was worrying. But that's missing the point.

I couldn't bring myself to be pointing out meaningless stuff on spelling and grammar when this boy was obviously pretty sad and disturbed about his uncle's death. So, the tuition became a 1-2-1 chat about his uncle. The boy always looked up to his uncle, and was extremely disturbed why such a good man like his uncle had to suffer cancer and die early.

I was feeling so sad for the little boy! But thank God really for gospel sharing opportunities. What was absolutely brilliant was the fact that, when I probed further, the boy revealed to me that the uncle actually received Christ a couple of weeks before his death. I was so glad!! So from 'My Sadness', I began to share with the boy how he should actually be happy for his uncle. For his uncle has come to know the greatest joy of all - to be accepted by God despite how imperfect we are. To see the smile on the boy's face, when he realised that his uncle is actually at a much better position now that he's a Christian called home, totally made my day. From sadness to pure gladness. And the boy even asked questions on what Jesus should mean to him. How amazing the way God works...

So to those in the tuition ministry, or really, in any other ministry or with relationships with any of your close ones - remember, its all worth it. To persevere in holding on to the hope held out to us in the gospel, to live faithfully and gratefully in light of CHrist's sacrifice, to always be ready to share the good news of Christ.

:) I can't wait to meet the boy again for tuition this Sunday. :)

2006-09-04T12:39:00.000+08:00

Godliness with contentment... Without spot or blame.

1 Tim 6:11-12:

'But you, man of God, flee from all this, and pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, endurance and gentleness. Fight the good fight of the faith. Take hold of the eternal life to which you were called when you made your good confession in the presence of many witnesses.'

2006-08-30T09:22:00.000+08:00

Keep the Joy!

I've been catching up / hearing from many close christian friends of their struggles recently. It can be pretty depressing - broken families, parental problems, relationship breakups, jadedness, doubts and sickness.

I think a couple of years back I'd have felt pretty helpless and affected, prob doubt the trustworthiness of God. But what has been supremely encouraging is the positive attitude of my fellow brothers + sisters in Christ. Rather than wallow in doubt/self-pity, I've been so encouraged by their willingness to surrender all and trust in His goodness. I'm so glad. :)

HEaring all the sharings, I've been v v much prompted to be more prayerful in my life, to give thanks to God for everything, and not take things for granted. To pray that I'll continue to trust in his good glorious plans for me as a child of his, and never doubt that.

Personally, I've been so blessed to have a relatively un-problematic life. Thank God for grace. Pray though with me for my parents - my dad's health's been getting worse (kidney failing, left ear going deaf), and he's pretty disturbed himself. It saddens me to see him pondering over each meal how much he should eat, what he should eat, or whether to even eat at all. I know he hasn't been getting v good sleep, waking at odd hours or just not being able to rest.

Mum's been acting pretty ok abt it all, but I know for a fact she's not a strong character, so its just a front she's putting up. Also, she's quitting her current child-care job in a couple of months. Good too, for I don't quite approve of the negative 'Christian' testimonies of her colleagues. But being 50 years old, I'm not that optimistic of her finding other jobs so easily. In any case, she wants to go away for some months, take a year out perhaps, to go travelling with Dad whilst he's still relatively healthy, able to walk, and just experience the world's that out there. So sweet right? Hearing all the family struggles my friends go through, I really thank God for mine.

But pls pray with me that my parents realise, that now at retirement age, its more than the physical world they ought to explore - life has greater meaning in all eternity, Christ dying on the cross is something they need to know, that it offers them real hope of a complete relationship with one another, and with God. I've shared the gospel with them q a few times, pray I live out the message of love I preach.

=)

This is adulthood isn't it. Welcome to the mid-20s keeevin. :) Soon I'll be the sole breadwinner of the family.. hanging out with PUNJers can give you the illusion that you are 19 all the time. But I'm happy, its been for a few years, but since going to UK i've been looking forward to coming back, if for nothing else, my family.

My mum grinned widely when I offered her a supp card as I applied for the POSB Everyday to pay the house bills. She said its ok, just give her enough money to buy kueh to eat each month.

=)

Plug on everyone - and let's keep the joy.

2006-08-21T21:03:00.000+08:00

Dinner at Hougang! =)

As promised... these are the pictures with the PUNJ leaders, my PUNJ group, and the Nagaland team at my place in Hougang last Sat.

I had a such a blast - thanks buddies for coming all the way to NE Singapore!

2006-08-14T10:02:00.000+08:00

Thanksgivings... Life, Jesus, Heaven.

1) Thank God for a smooth transition to teacher training at NIE so far...

2) Thank God for friends like J (the WRX), EK (the dolphin) and M (the foodie) for making English and long 4 hours lectures more bearable...

3) Thank God for providing good Christian accountability partners in NIE...

4) And really, thank God for brothers and sisters in PUNJ and the PUNJab leaders for prayers and great words of encouragement and fellowship.

5) And I know there are quite a few outside of Singapore shores reading this blog - thank God for providing his Son to redeem us sinners so that we can come together as family. =)

M asked me the other day in NIE - does one need to believe in Jesus Christ in order to get to heaven? Her question has been playing in my head ever since, and it reminded me so much of my pre-Christian days when I found it so unfair, even offensive, that God can be so 'myopic' and limited in His love to admit only those who believe in Jesus.

But gradually, as I studied the bible, I began to see otherwise. Its easy to judge the bible as a piece of biased literature that perpetuates Christian propaganda - so arrogant of the Christians to make such exclusive claims! But the sheer coherence and detailed chronology of what Jesus said and did when he came to this earth simpy blew my mind. Crucially, I realised that the bible was written by many different authors - many of whom were eyewitnesses of the events of 2000 years ago. And amazingly, though they may not know one another, their records of historical events do not contradict. And even more amazingly, they shed light on God's purposes since eternity, fitting seamlessly with the words of the prophets in the Old Testament 700 years before Jesus.

And they all pointed to one fact. That this world we live in, it belongs to God. This life we live, it has been graciously provided by God. God intended with all goodness to have a perfect relationship with us - true heaven, as Christians like to describe it. Yet, yet we choose to reject that, to live as if we are independent of Him, as if we are the kings, not Him. Think about it - if left by ourselves, which one of us ever cared two hoots about God and His authority over our lives?

To understand God's graciousness in allowing anyone to enter heaven, we first need to understand that actually, none of us deserves to be there. As the Apostle Paul explains in the book of Romans, 3:10-12 -

'There is no one righteous, not even one; there is no one who understands, no one who seeks God. All have turned away, (we) have together become worthless; there is no one who does good, not even one.'

The world belongs to God, yet we choose to live selfishly by our own rules. This grieves God, and God is not all lovey-dovey and without anger and judgment. Dare we admit we need to stand accountable before God, and to answer to Him the way we've been leading our lives? The bible is clear that the universal judgement for all is death. None of us stands up to the test. If at the gates of heaven, our lives are cross-examined - do you think you are actually perfect and good enough to enter? I know I'm not...

And that is why I'm truly thankful for Jesus. For it is not by my merit that God can accept me in eternity in heaven - but by what Jesus did. Jesus came to earth for a purpose. To take on all our punishments, by dying on the cross. And only because he's perfect, and God Himself, that this substitution will do. What results? In true Singapore style, entry into Heaven becomes a free gift (I know, this is a grammar mistake. Don't be pedantic. I just want to emphasize how wonderful that the gift is free heh). Not even buy one get one free. For we pay nothing, we give nothing, there is no price we can offer. Jesus has done it all - the only thing we can do is to trust in Him and change our lives to follow Him.

And that is why Christians claim that only believing in Jesus will admit us into heaven. The question is, are we willing to accept this free ticket into heaven, or do we still hold stubbornly to our own independent lives? The choice is ours to make - my heartfelt plea is to make a judgment for the long looooong term, not just for the short term, life in this world.

And remember, this great deal and offer does not stand forever. =)

2006-08-03T09:11:00.000+08:00

Quick Updates

School in full swing now, so some quick updates.

Thank God, but I must say I'm enjoying my first couple of weeks in NIE. Even the distance doesn't really matter. I haven't been hitching a ride on J's car as we are currently doing different tutorials, but the travel is nice for some reflections, and to listen to sermons and songs on my iPod. Had some good conversations with fellow colleagues on the bus/MRT as well.

Indeed, people are more friendly at home, compared to the experience of mine when studying overseas (those aloof Brits) - so many ready smiles and keen happy conversations in SG! Quite fun people to laugh with as well... who says teachers are boring? =)

Beginning of teacher training also got me thinking more seriously about the great responsibility of this career choice. I don't want to be just earning a salary. There is so much teachers can do to change the lives of youths. As a Christian, there's so much more impetus to make a difference, as we are called to a gospel love for all whom Christ has shed his royal blood for. Am I watching my life, being a good role model, and putting Christ in the centre of my life's goals and ambitions? Lots to think about.

And of course, the multiple reading lists we are given are starting to get to me now. Haven't done a single bit of reading yet, been exploring the swimming facilities of NIE instead. But a trip to the library made me realise that most of the core textbooks have already been reserved by fellow coursemates - now that's scary.

2006-07-31T10:49:00.000+08:00

Timetable Woes...

OOOOoooooooohhh.... NIE/NTU's timetabling is so confusing, and the online Portal so non-user friendly, its giving me a big headache.

Timetables are supposed to help in organizing time - aye? But on the contrary, I find myself sitting at my computer, taking a couple of hours (trying) to sort our my weekly schedule. DOH!

2006-07-24T17:19:00.000+08:00

First (Official) Day At NIE - Much to Give Thanks For!!!

God is so good, I'm so utterly grateful. =)

First day. NIE is so far. Woke up at 6.20am. In fact, I kept waking up at 1-2 hours intervals before that. First day jitters? ;p

Saw only a few familar faces amongst a sea of strangers. But aren't close to these people at all - mostly fellow scholars whom I haven't been able to 'connect' so much with (non-hwachongians maybe?).

Was feeling a bit 'duh', seeing all the hundreds of teacher trainees happily chit-chatting to people they know, and just when I was scanning the LT to look for somewhere to sit, someone called out my name (Zhen Jie!!!). Thank God!! Its someone I knew back in sec school days, a girl from RGS whom I was director for in a play for Chinese Drama. Yay. Got to learn over lunch with her that she's Christian too. And her motivations to be a teacher. Very cool, very encouraged. =)

Afternoon came, and we were now to break up into smaller groups, according to our Curriculum Subjects. These will be the people I study, learn, eat, live, breathe Geography with over the next year or so. Went into the room, and decided to sit myself beside J, who was sitting alone, and introduced myself. Good thing I did that, for those who swarmed into the room later all seem to be from the same giggly clique from NUS geog. So J and I introduced ourselves to another loner guy (EK) later, and we were quite happy hanging out together.

And guess what? J stays in Serangoon North, very near my place. J drives. J has his own car. A very cool WRX. J is very happy to drive me to and from school. J plays squash too, and he was more than happy to chat with me about Christianity, about my views on catholics / charismatics / Da Vinci Code, about Jesus. He was from SJI, but his bible understanding is minimal. But very happy and open to chat. Wow. And we'll have many many chances to in our classes and car journeys. God is so good. :)

How about EK? You won't believe it, but I got to learn that EK was an ex-dg leader at ARPC. He decided to move church for some pretty good reason that we promised each other we'll chat more about. Wow.

3 people I met today. 3 meaingful conversations and relationships initiated. Thank God really.

So much so I don't even care that I will have my first test come Friday. =) Hee. At least I know J will drive me there. Hee hee. =)

2006-07-23T20:45:00.000+08:00

Yummy Burger , Yummy Blog

The above picture is from my fave blog - www.chubbyhubby.net. This guy shares (with his wife) with the most awesome digital photos of his number one passion - food. You got to check it out. He's got lots of good recipes, and good reviews of top-notch restaurants in Singapore. Lovely. And I love the look of that burger above.. its at this place called Wild Rocket, in the super cool, uberhip budget traveller hotel http://www.hangouthotels.com. Located at Mt Emily.. near the Istana. Nice. Must try sometime.

Nagaland - The Land

2006-07-20T09:02:00.000+08:00

Nagaland - the Land

Above are pictures of Nagaland, and more specifically, our arrival in India and our trip uo to Kohima, the town we visited. Set upon the hills of NE India, the weather in Kohima is wonderfully temperate, at an average of 24 degrees whilst we were there.

Its probably what one would expect - mostly rural, mostly agricultural, hilly, with isolated settlements here and there. What I was surprised by was the amount of GREENERY everywhere. And the clouds that surround and envelope, whether in the evening, or early in the morning, or at any time when its about to rain (which is very often). Quite charming. :)

The pictures say it all. What you see is probably the team's first impression of Kohima as we approach. A nice respite from the humidity and heat of Kolkata and Dimapur, some sort of 'Shangri-la' upon the hills. The ride up was somewhat bumpy and steep though - not good for the travel sickness prone.

But Kohima itself is crowded, a cluster of a motley crew of shophouses, restaurants, provision shops and ahem, CHURCHES. A first clue that we are at a land statistically 90% Christian. Very nice. Included in the pictures above is our first impression of City Church, home church of our host and contact, Zajamo. Arriving at 6pm in the evening, amidst setting sun and breathtaking scenery and all, we really don't know what to expect...

More to follow.

2006-07-18T08:22:00.000+08:00

TIME Interview with Katharine Jefferts Schori
Presiding Bishop-elect of the Episcopal Church of the U.S.A.

Below is an excerpt of some parts (I selected 3 questions and added in my comments) of Time's interview with the above mentioned (KJS), who's the presiding head of the Episcopal (i.e. Anglican) Church in USA. You may not agree with my views (comments and questions welcome), but it is my perspective as a Christian. And my opinion is that we really do need to pray for our church in America and beyond...

1) TIME: What will be your focus as head of the U.S. church?

KJS: Our focus needs to be on feeding people who go to bed hungry, on providing primary education to girls and boys, on healing people with AIDS, on addressing tuberculosis and malaria, on sustainable development. That ought to be the primary focus.

Me: She sounds just like one of my course-mates on my Msc program in school. I studied Geography and Environemntal Policy, and we were dead passionate about social justice, social work and sustainable development - that's our identity as socially aware environmentalists/geographers.

But you see, looking at KJS' answer, how does her focus differ in any way from geographers / environmentalists / or any other social-justice group? How is the US church in any way distinct in identity - why do they call themselves Christian???

As Christians, our chief motivation as we serve God in his world is to glorify him. The way we do that is primarily by sharing the salvation he offers through Jesus Christ - all our efforts, love and gifts ought to be focused on this end. Yes, we ought to care for people and the environment, definitely. But we do this knowing the fullness of life not just for now, but more importantly, for eternity. We understand the greatest need for sinful people in this fallen world is salvation, and we seek primarily to share the good news that is offered in Jesus' death and resurrection - that is where true, eternal hope lies. That is our mission in this world. That is what Christian love and focus ought to be about.

Not simply social justice and social work - but preaching His judgment, the gospel and His words.

2) TIME: Is belief in Jesus the only way to get to heaven?

KJS: We who practice the Christian tradition understand him as our vehicle to the divine. But for us to assume that God could not act in other ways is, I think, to put God in an awfully small box.

Me: I think KJS needs to come attend PUNJ and for our sessions in the basics of the gospel, for JL, for B2B, for our evangelistic training sessions. That's not a very helpful answer is it? How again does this answer make her identity distinctively Christian? Her answer is as good as any other atheist / postmodernist / non-Christian.

The Apostle Peter said in Acts 4:12 'Salavation is found in no-one else, for there is no other name under heaven given to men by which we must be saved.'

The fundamentals of Christian faith is that Jesus, God's son, the messiah and Lord, is the only way for us to be saved. In Jesus' own words - 'I am the truth, the way and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.' (John 14:6)

A very exclusive claim, perhaps arrogant you say. But if we truly believe Jesus as our Lord and saviour, we have to take his words seriously. Do all roads lead to heaven, just like to Rome? Apparently not. Are we putting God in a very small box? I don't think so. God has made himself very clear - the only way to heaven, to be saved, to be accepted by God is through his son Jesus Christ. The narrow way to life (Matthew 7:14) is very narrow indeed. We ought to be steadfast and bold in proclaiming this truth, for Christ bought us this route into heaven with the heavy price of his blood.

3) TIME: What is your prayer for the church today?

KJS: That we remember the centrality of our mission is to love each other. That means caring for our neighbors. And it does not mean bickering about fine points of doctrine.

Me: Again, a very worthy and honourable vision, we ought to love one another, as Jesus himself said.

But we need to be clear of the fundamentals, on why and how we love. We need to be standing firm on gospel fundamentals - not for the sake of bickering, but that we can truly share Christian love in a way that honours and glorifies God. How is Christian love distinct? We love only because we realize we are unworthy people saved by grace - we seek to live our lives differently as people saved by Christ's blood. Love rejoices in the truth - my prayer for our church (i.e. people of God) today is that we hold steadfast to the truth of Jesus Christ, and seek to live our lives in light of that.

Looking at KJS' responses to Time's interview, I plead you pray with me

2006-07-16T20:27:00.000+08:00

Totally Random

To those not in the know, I'm someone who enjoys my time at home immensely. To read. To bake. To relax. To think. And often, and very jealously so, I enjoy such time alone. So please don't be offended if I sound less than keen to head out for supper, to hang out - its just me being selfish with my time, nothing to do with any of you being bad company. :)

When I flew off for UK a while ago, I actually looked forward immensely to having lots of time alone and by myself. Many can testify how hard it was to get me out during my first year in Oxford. Socialising was just not my 'thing'. On the contrary, I loved roaming the streets alone, checking out exotic stores and shops, experimenting on my cooking etc.

I changed a little over the years, when I got attached to a particularly sociable SY and also realised the importance of fellowship as I began to centre my life around Christ.

But often, my first inclination is still to be by myself. No offence to anyone, but many a times I have to make a very conscious effort to be spending time with people. If you feel I'm being anti-social, just gimme a kick in the butt. I succumb to peer pressure as easily as a souffle to a push of the fork. Its not like I don't enjoy company anyway... just that time alone is... nice. :)

Okay, this is totally random, but I'm looking at my calendar, and thinking, 'Hmm.. shall I go backpacking this December?'

(After LC+HL's wedding and PUNJ Camp, don't panic, those implicated...)

I've not done independent travelling for some time. And perhaps there won't be any better time.

Where to go?

1) New York during Christmas sounds good.

2) Appalachian trial is nice, but too cold in Dec.

3) Tokyo?

4) Or Europe... Germany/Switzerland, dropping by UK for a bit of nolstalgia and visiting?

Anybody keen? Budget travelling, in youth hostels, basic meals (with the occasional treat), and rough and tumble transport, with Lonely Planet as our best friend.

2006-07-15T21:20:00.000+08:00

We Are The Reason

Its not Christmas I know, but heck, this is one song I feel a lot for. Some of you know I like 'Before the Throne of God Above' - its one song that really hit me when I finally realised what it means to be a sinner saved by grace.

'We Are the Reason' is probably the song that I adore most though. Many personal feelings invested in this song, both in the simple lyrics and the many events in my life I associate with this song.

It reminds me that being a Christian is Very Humbling. Very Hard. But also Very Heartening.

As little children we would dream of Christmas morn
Of all the gifts and toys we knew we'd find
But we never realized a baby born one blessed night
Gave us the greatest gift of our lives

*We were the reason that He gave His life
We were the reason that He suffered and died
To a world that was lost He gave all He could give
To show us the reason to live

As the years went by we learned more about gifts
The giving of ourselves and what that means
On a dark and cloudy day a man hung crying in the rain
All because of love All because of love

*Chorus

I finally found the reason for living
It's in giving every part of my heart to Him (every part to Him)
And all that I do every word that I say (you know I'll be saying)
I'll be giving my all just for Him, for Him (every thing for Him)

We are the reason that He gave His life
We are the reason that He suffered and died
To a world that was lost He gave all He could give (all that he could give all)
To show us the reason to live

2006-07-08T10:01:00.000+08:00

Tired!!!

Whew! The past week in camp has been the most tiring I've ever been through. Setting up exhibition material at some secluded training area in preparation for a visit by our Defence Minister, and my goodness, there was just TONNEs of stuff to carry, move and organize! Didn't help that my colleagues are mostly PES E ppl who can't do much physical stuff, and that many of the so-called 'bosses' and 'leaders' aren't really leading by example, barking orders to poor chaps without actually getting down and dirty themselves. And they expected us to work through without dinner and water. While they sit in the air-con office playing games and chatting on the phone. *Sigh* 5 more working days..... can't wait.

Good time bonding though with the boys before I leave, and hey, its a free workout. =) No need for no gym. Too bad though for the heat and dirt rashes thrown in free-of-charge. =P

Thank God this work came AFTER Nagaland, not before. I'm just totally worn out now, thankfully LC and YG and others took charge of Evan Trg for PUNJ this weekend. Thanks Bros!!! :) I love gospel partners and my family in Christ... =)

Meanwhile, keeev is shutting down his engine and switching off for a while. CTRL-ALT-DEL... Goodbye!

2006-07-03T09:19:00.000+08:00

Nagaland Food... and Hospitality

Wonder why my digestive system is still struggling to cope? Check out the food we were offered in Nagaland... This slideshow for all the mains we had, check out the other slideshow below with all the yummy homemade puddings and desserts. Amazing. Greedy Keeev can't help but help himself to all. Look out for the King Chilli - hottest in the world. Note also the multiple feasts we had every evening at different homes. The team got truly sick of food by the end of the trip. Reeeeeally sick. Need to detox and just have water and cereal...

The womenfolk in Nagaland are truly amazing. They probably slugged it out for the entire day to cook such feasts for us, and their skill with western puddings are fantasticoooo! During dinner, they serve us, and keep replenishing the food, retreating to the kitchen to leave the guests with the male leaders. Only when we proceed to desserts and puddings, do they start to clear the mains - AND begin their own dinner. Wow. Not that I endorse that of our households here in Singapore, but its an interesting reflection of their culture. Note pls that the males don't bully the females - its just their culture with clear household roles, lived out in a very gentle loving manner. Very Christianly sweet.

You may be thinking its strange of me to start my blogging on our Nagaland mission with photos of FOOD - but its for a few reasons.

1) Naga hospitality left a HUGE impression on the team, and perhaps only photos of these food can do them any bit of justice. Such love and generosity went into every meal, and every detail to make us comfortable! Truly 3 John lived out in the heartiest manner possible, a wonderful picture of Christian love and hospitality.

2) You can also check out Wenjie's and Huiling's blogs for more observations / details on other aspects of the trip. I will write more soon as well.

3) C'mon, do you seriously expect keeev to not rave about food?!?!

2006-07-02T20:23:00.000+08:00

I touched down at Changi on Thursday.

Went to Changi to receive my Daddy (who went to Xiamen to attend a wedding) yesterday.

In 10 hours, I'll be at Changi, sending off my brother as he flies off once again to Cornell.

Too many turnovers. Phew.

BTW, my stomach hasn't been too good since India, and it churned and turned for the worse today. *groan* Can feel a fever coming too. Been downing multiple cups of 'cooling tea' - maybe I should just heck it and let 'em rip.

But other than physically wise, I feel great since coming back from India. Good time spent with family, catching up with some, and it was a fun sharing time at PUNJ today I thought. Came back from PUNJ today enjoying the bit of personal time I finally got to reflect and be quiet with myself.

Photos and thoughts on Nagaland by tommorow I promise. Meanwhile, back to nurse my tummy, get a last chat with my bro, and enjoying my quiet time at home. =)

2006-06-30T09:52:00.000+08:00

Back From Nagaland

I'm back! =)

Nagaland was great - thanks for prayers and encouragements. Everyone was safe, and things went on smoothly. =)

A review and pictures will come, let me first sit and reflect upon it for a while.

Suffice to say, we experienced a lot of Christian love, Christian hospitality, Christian joy and encouragements from our wonderfully gentle and kind Naga friends.

With heavy and generous doses of chilli, local delights, sweet desserts.. etc.

Lemme rest my tummy and my body for a while... ;p

2006-06-19T19:50:00.000+08:00

Quick Update, Prayer Requests

I know I have been quite a failure in updating my blog / responding to comments recently - for that I'm truly really sorry!!! :(

With PUNJ starting again, evangelism training in full swing, and mission trip to Nagaland coming up this week... Its been so hectic and busy I'm actually kindda stressed. I'm usually pretty chill as I like to prepare ahead to avoid stress (I recall joining OUMSSA for mahjong a week before finals, shocking everyone with my cool attitude haha!). But this time round, there's just quite a few things at hand to be pondering about. But its been really quite nice to hear from a number of you that you've been praying. So I won't be paiseh (shy) - prayer request #1, that I have good focus on what / why I'm doing, and that I'll continue to depend on Him for strength.

Before I forget, just want to say that I enjoyed my time with my PUNJ group yesterday during evangelism training immensely!! Everyone was a little cold at first, having not met in almost a month. I tell you, at that point I was almost panicking, wondering what funny things I should do to 'spice' things up a bit. But truly, trust the gospel and its power for salvation for all who believe. The group warmed up as Carilyn and I shared our testimonies on how the gospel changed our lives, and I speak for both of us that we were immensely encouraged by the prayer sharing session as a group. Here's looking forward to greater growth together in Him! =)

Nagaland. I'm preparing 2 workshops - 1) How to Prepare and Lead a Bible Study, and 2) Evangelism as a Small Group. We'll be spending time with the student leaders there, but its probably good caution to not assume too much about their clarity in gospel understanding (perhaps due to my past experience at Kolkata), and be too cheem (deep) and academic on our prep. Many are nominal Christians who grew up in 'Christian' families (Nagaland is statiscally 90% Christian, believe it or not), and may not have genuinely come to recognize the Lordship and saving work of Christ. Working to keep emphasizing the gospel basics of sin, grace and repentance in my workshops, whilst keeping half a mind to convert one of the workshops into a talk for PUNJ in time to come. So prayer request #2 - that I'm faithful to His words, and be thinking of how best to serve those I'm teaching. Very impt!!!!

And with all the tasks at hand, pray that I have time and heart to be thinking about relationship building with the Nagas and my groupies in PUNJ. It feels so 'fake' to just prepare and do workshops and studies, without getting more involved with lives. I'm utterly guilty I admit - there's so many I promised to meet up with, to chat, to catch up, but haven't the time or energy. Looking forward to making lasting relationships in this trip to Nagaland, pray for that!!

And fellow members of this mission trip - you guys / gals are way cool man. Everyone's jumping to volunteer for this or that, serving each other's needs. Haha, serious. Sometimes its a little bewildering hee. Well thank God, and may we not come back tearing each other apart!!

Travel-lust

2006-06-09T11:44:00.000+08:00

Travel-lust, Mission-Heart

I have always loved traveling (ranks high up there with Christ and Cooking haha!), backpacking and getting to know more about this world we live in. The missions themed Church Camp we had only served to open my eyes further to the diversity of the peoples of this world, and the urgent need for gospel proclamation everywhere. As a geography grad who studied in UK, I've been quite blessed to be able to explore around a bit. Hee... this would annoy some ppl, but let me list the countries / places I've been to:

Australia (Perth, Cairns, Sydney)
Austria (Vienna, Salzburg)
China (Shanghai)
Czech Republic (Prague)
England (Oxford, London, Bath, Bristol, Cambridge etc.)
France (Paris)
Greece (Crete)
Hong Kong
India (Kolkata)
Ireland (Killerny)
Italy (Rome, Florence, Venice, Milan)
Malaysia (too many)
Morroco (Tangier, Marrakesh)
New Zealand (Christchurch, Queenstown, Fox Glacier)
Portugal (Lisboa)
Russia (Moscow, St Petersburg)
Scotland (Edinburgh, Glasgow)
South Africa (Cape Town, Jo’Burg)
South Korea (Seoul)
Spain (Madrid, Barcelona, Sevilla, Grenada)
Thailand (Bangkok, Phuket)
United States of America (San Francisco, L.A., Las Vegas, Grand Canyon) Vatican City (yes it counts as another country!!) Wales (some ulu farm.. haha)

A pity that most of my backpacking trips were done before I became a Christian, so I wasn't tt acutely sensitive to the gospel receptivity of peoples and cultures, but rather, more fascinated with places and their histories. However, as a self-proclaimed 'human' geographer who's actually more like a sociologist, I must say I'm quite in awe by the diversity of the world we live in, this world God created and commissioned us to be reaching out to.

A never exhaustive source of encouragement for me is always the international student work I witnessed and loved in St Ebbes Oxford. That was where I was convicted of the gospel, that was where I saw peoples of all nations coming to read the bible, and peoples of all languages and cultures coming to embrace God's grace and growing in Christ-likeness. It was truly the gospel to all nations - Singaporeans, Malaysians, Chinese, Africans, Japanese, Americans, Hong Kong-ese, Koreans etc - very amazing. Who says Christianity is a 'western' religion? That isn't God's plan... as it is written even in the book of Isaiah,

'Every valley shall be filled, and every mountain and hill shall be made low, and the crooked shall become straight, and the rough places shall become level ways, and all flesh shall see the salvation of God.' (Luke 3:5-6, Isaiah 40:3-5)

May God always put a burden in our hearts to be looking out for all peoples of the world, to love and to win, however different, however difficult it may be. May we be conformed to the likeness of Christ, to love and reach out to His people, as we recognize His Lordship over all.

Oh yes, on this topic of 'missions'. Do pray for me and the team, as we head to Nagaland, India come June 21st. Pray that our hearts will be dedicated to and focused upon Christ, to look after one another's needs, as we look out sensitively for opportunities to grow together in the knowledge and love for Christ in this new land. ;)

Back from Church Camp!!

2006-06-08T10:55:00.000+08:00

Back from Church Camp!!!

Just back from ARPC Church Camp 2006, a missions themed camp. It was QUITE an interesting and challenging camp, with a great overview on all the missions going on in Singapore and abroad (e.g. drug rehab, BB-GB, Mien, Nagaland, Cambodia, TWRC etc). Very challenged each time by Iain Smith and Chappo on the urgency of gospel proclamation, and really, the focus of 'mission' as one about faithfulness in our walk with Christ as we appreciate His grace and mercy.

Small group though from us PUNJ who were up at Melaka, but cool too as we got to know each other (and others in church) better. Camps like these are wonderful in building relationships, and the wonderful fellowship always gives you a hangover after, sigh!

I'll miss the fellowship and all the constant good conversations and teachings - but who says you can only have these in camp?? :) Let's continue to live faithfully to His words to us, to love one another and be 'missionaries' whereever and whenever!

-----------

Two things etched in my mind from Iain Smith's words:

1) 'Don't ask God to bless your work for Him, ask God to involve you in His work. God, please use me in your plans, despite of me, even in my sin.'

2) 'We were never told to be missionaries - but rather, told the meaning of GRACE. We will naturally be involved in missions should we understand and truly appreciate His grace.'

------------

A bible passage etched in my head too.. Acts 2:42-47. I want to be part of a community like this!! =)

'And they devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching and fellowship, to the breaking of bread and the prayers. And awe came upon every soul, and many wonders and signs were being done through the apostles. And all who believed were together and had all things in common. And they were selling their possessions and belongings and distributing the proceeds to all, as any had need. And day by day, attending the temple together and breaking breaad in their homes, they received their food with glad and generous hearts, praising God and having favour with all the people. And the Lord added to their number day by day those who were being saved.'

2006-05-31T22:49:00.000+08:00

Acts of Love

Just a short one. Reading the book of Acts in prep for Church Camp now, and I'm really struck by how encouraging the book is.

Yes, its encouraging to see how the early NT church grew in numbers, but what really struck me was their LOVE for one another. Read Acts 2:42-47, Acts 4:32-37, Acts 11:19-30. These people really epitomised what it means to live out a self-less Christlike love for one another in their community!!!

May ARPC, PUNJ and indeed all our Christian communities in this age and time live out this great love that Christ has shown. GENUINELY. :)

2006-05-24T20:22:00.000+08:00

Green.

It is a different green, a green I wear.
In the name of service,
A responsibility we all bear.
Early each morn I trudge,
To the east or western tip of this isle.
Who knows this heart of mine which is filled with bile?

Bitter coffee first thing in the morn,
The clock ticks by,
Only a few minutes gone.
Between boss and men I am torn,
A child struggling to fit,
'Be sober minded. . . do not conform.'

For everything there is a season,
And a time for every matter under heaven.
A time to be born, and a time to die.
A time to love, and a time to hate.
A time to weep, and a time to laugh.
A time to seek, and a time to lose.
A time to keep, and a time to cast. . .

I am at Oxford again, its quiet here in St Johns.
The early morn air is sharp,
The cold a balm to a melancholic heart.
The immaculate lawns still a luscious green,
Squirrels dart by, playful. . .
Yet soon not to be seen.
The gentle willows sway in the wind,
Tiny green thistles beckoning,
And if it could speak. . .

Forget the green on the other side,
Its life right now you have to fight.
The end is near,
Its not far from your sight.
The armour of God is right with you,
Fear God, and walk in Jesus's stride.
Even, even when it seems you are drowning in the tide.

To take the very situation we associate with melancholy – being blue – and make it smile.

2006-05-19T23:12:00.000+08:00

To take the very situation we associate with melancholy, being blue, and make it smile.

You know, I have been thinking. It is so easy as humans to be trapped within our own world of melancholy, a deep sea of blue. To be over-obsessed with the failures, upsets and disappointments of our life, and to ask God, Why???

But yet, drawing ourselves away from the myopic fascination with self, it is hard not to come to appreciate how generous and gracious God has, and always will be. How life in itself, whatever the package comes with, is itself something worthy of being totally and heartily grateful for. How so? 2 ways. Look to others, and look to Christ.

1) Look to Others.

One thing I have learnt. No one in life has it easy. Absolutely no one. Any religion, philosophy or political organization which promises you total fulfillment and happiness, a wonderfully smooth life and tangible blessings without cost, is absolutely konky. Absolutely konky.

Experientially, just speak to anyone close to you. One thing I have learnt, with no small amount of tugging in the heart - struggles in life come in all forms. And EVERYBODY is subject to it. Material wants and needs. Physical sicknesses and emotional ills. A deep sense of loneliness and the screaming out for a kindred spirit(s). The less-than-perfect family, career or even something as superficial as looks and physical attractiveness. The list goes on forever. And in an odd sense, you draw a certain level of comfort from that. You are not the only one struggling. Everyone’s in it with you together. In fact, empathizing with others will only make you realize, in a relative position, what you can be thankful for in this life you call your own.

2) Look to Christ.

In a sense, being a Christian does not help. In fact, it ups the level of melancholy and blues - for you come to realize the present state of the world we are ALL in. Struggles in life - we cannot escape it, the world is fallen. Through no one's fault, but OUR OWN. And that realization is key. For you realize that no matter how hard we try, there is no way we can make our lives perfect. No matter what we do, the world will not be pain and struggle free. By ourselves, we are weak and pretty much helpless with our omni-potent struggles in this fallen world. Quite helpless. Tiring and easily disillusional, and its always a temptation to be bitter, to give up.

Yet thank God we do not live in this screwed up world as if we are in a vacuum, cut off from the outside, wondering always what life is all about. Personally, I am really glad that in Christ, I have an amazing revelation from God, a physical and tangible appearance from the one who is referred to as the 'image of the invisible God'. He is the one who was there at creation, who came into this world with a wonderful message of what my life is all about. That he is our Lord and Saviour, that I belong to him, and that we have a wonderful hope for the future. A certain hope that is as sure as the fact that he really did came, that he really did die, that he really did rise. If ever these 3 facts can be disproved in front of my living eyes, I will die a very miserable man. But it is precisely because of such certainty I can have in Christ, that I can say I can look to him for real comfort and joy.

Life may be terrible now, you think. But with Christ, life takes on a whole new meaning. Something we never even deserved beforehand. An ongoing lesson in my life is to take life's package as it is - it is after all God's well-meaning gift for me to grow in character as I put my hope in Him. This hope will not disappoint, for we can trust God, whom by dying has so very clearly demonstrated His love for us. Not easy. . . but its something oh-so-tangible to always fall back on.

3) To take the very situation we associate with melancholy - being blue - and make it smile.

Its silly and probably pure self-denial to think that we in ourselves can be strong enough to put aside struggles and start over anew. God's words make it clear - take no confidence in the flesh, for by ourselves we cannot possibly achieve the end-goal of perfection. We may grimace in our struggles, we moan, we question. Why cannot I do better? Why must I be stuck in this? Why am I dealt with such crappy cards in this lousy game of life? We look back in regret, and wonder the reason for our sufferings. But, do we remember HIS suffering, HIS giving away of himself for us, that we may have reason to continue in our press in this race?

I hope this little entry is encouraging for anyone reading this, whether in struggles big or small - we have an assurance from God that we can forget what is behind, but strain towards what is ahead. We find the past haunting us, but to forget does not mean to wipe out from all memory the trials we have been, and will be, through. Philippians 3:10-11. I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so, somehow, to attain to the resurrection from the dead.

Through suffering, we come to identify with Christ our saviour and Lord more and more. Through suffering we come to empathize what others in this world are invariably subject to as well. We share in his sufferings - not to wallow in it - but to be moulded in character to trust Him more and more. To praise and rejoice in Him what come may. My prayer for all is that in whatever situation we are in, when melancholic, sad or blue - to always take hold of the situation in light of Christ. To praise Him still, to smile through it, and to bring the same smiles to others. To look to others, as we look to Christ.

2006-05-14T19:32:00.000+08:00

Fly Away - Corrine May

Weird song to post on Mother's day I know. But its a song close to my heart for many more reasons than one. Its a song I first heard when I was in UK, a song well loved by my housemate and I. A song that so very well conveys the incomparable and unconditional love of mums, in contrast and in tension with the desires, aspirations, dreams, travel-lust and seek of independence of youngsters like us.

My mum just gave me full support to go on the mission trip to Nagaland. She's almost always so supportive, in whatever I do. She's not a Christian - its such a blessing to have such an understanding mum (and dad). My parents are simple, contented with life, happy, desiring nothing more than family bliss. They support me in all I do, in all the decisions I make. In a sense they are so 'godly', never desiring more than what they have. Even when I jump so much into service for Christ, in something that they totally don't understand, they never stood in the way. Even encouraging me to pursue what I think is worthy. What more can one ask for??? Yet, without Christ... its all for nought.

The sense of loss in this song is very real - when in UK, listening to this song just makes you yearn to come back home so much and be a model filial child. To spend time where time is lost in the 4 years overseas. To shower parents with the ultimate love - to bring them to know Christ that they too may have eternal life. Parents' ain't young... esp Dad with all his health problems. In the 4 years I was away, I literally witnessed the sped-up aging of my dad. From a healthy chuckling dad who introduced me to badminton and table tennis... to one who struggles to be on his feet for too long. Each time I came home for summer, it breaks my heart to see Dad becoming so tangibly and increasingly weak.

But yet, its all in His timing, not mine. Thank God my parents agreed to come for the Mother's day dinner organized by church on Friday. They caught a glimpse of the hospitality and love of the ppl in my church. That I don't spend time with a bunch of wierdos, but ppl in love with God, and therefore in love with His ppl. But it was such a pity - I felt the msg on the night was really far too long, such that by the time the cross was being explained, by the time Christ was preached, my parents have switched off. They were looking at their watches and wondering when the next course is coming, and probably thinking in their heads, 'Free dinner yes.. but the price to pay is 50 minutes of listening to this guy speak...'

I dared not raise gospel conversations immediately after the talk and the dinner, for the feel was that any more, it would really be pushing the gospel down their throats. Pray that conversation opportunities would come, and that in my living, I'd be able to share Christ with them. And God, don't come back too soon? Need time... need time.

I mentioned that mum hardly puts any expectations on me. But in one aspect, she unconsciously does. She sat me down after dinner today, and chatted with me about my 2 failed relationships so far. She desires so much for one of her sons to settle down early, and for grandchildren, haha. But gosh, how do I get her to understand? After all that has happened, I just want so much to take things slow, and really, to appreciate the joys and benefits of being single. To wait on the Lord, and to grow in my relationship with Him. But how do I explain that to my mum? Just like how for my relationships, the issue of fulltime caused me to be unable to reconcile the first, and to be over-anxious in the second. How do I explain that to my mum?

I couldn't, and sitting down beside my mum, I couldn't bring myself to say more to her abt my BGR and christian struggles. And all I could do was to type out the lyrics to Corrine May's Fly Away. I know that though I can't explain to my mum fully my struggles, though she won't understand my Christian dreams, perspectives and desires... I know she'd still be supportive, in her quiet, gentle, strong and affirmative way. We are so far apart in this aspect - she'd never understand my position if she doesn't first understand her need for a relationship with Christ. And without that relationship with Christ, we'd in a sense always be so far apart.

Cheers to a mother's love on Mother's day. Unconditional and uncompromised, whatever circumstance. A little glimpse of Christ and heaven on Earth. Its just my desire, hope and prayer that she (and dad) will eventually be allowed a glimpse and entry into the most wonderful of sanctuaries, that of righteousness and a fully restored relationship with God, our Father. That we'd stand together in the multitude, praising His name.

Fly Away

"When will you be home?" she asks as we watch the planes take off.
We both know we have no clear answer to where my dreams may lead
She's watched me as i crawled and stumbled
As a child, she was my world
And now to let me go, I know she bleeds and yet she says to me

You can fly so high
Keep your gaze upon the sky
I'll be prayin every step along the way
Even though it breaks my heart to know we'll be so far apart
I love you too much to make you stay
Baby fly away

Autumn leaves fell into spring time and silver-painted hair
Daddy called one evening saying "We need you. Please come back"
When I saw her laying in her bed
Fragile as a child
Pale just like an angel taking flight I held her as I cried

You can fly so high
Keep your gaze upon the sky
I'll be prayin every step along the way
Even though it breaks my heart to know we'll be so far apart
I love you too much to make you stay
Baby fly away ohh...
I love you too much to make you stay
Baby fly away

2006-05-12T07:55:00.000+08:00

Marley and Me in Today

Yesterday's Today finally reported and had a book review on Marley and Me. A good week after I did. Looks like Today is not so 'today' after all... Book review raving about Marley? Pooh! That is so yesterday....

lonely souls

2006-05-11T02:57:00.000+08:00

Just came back from clubbing.

Quite sad. As I looked around the club, I wondered why all these young ppl were there. Many were drinking without talking. Dancing without looking as if they enjoyed it. I even spied a gal weeping silently as she danced in the arms of her man. Many were trying to impress, most seem to be on the 'lookout' for ppl (or prey?) from the other gender. And dumping more alcohol into each other's body, as if that's a means to achieve some greater goal.

Even the army mates I was with, quite a few went only because they were under peer pressure. Was quite glad to take a hour long break in-between to head out for some Hokkien Mee (late night calories alert, sigh), to accompany a couple of my mates (who were forcibly made drunk) to sober themselves.

I'm not against clubbing, no. Inherently speaking, there's nothing wrong with dancing and a little bit of drinks among mates. But there's so many grey areas in this, I don't even know how to begin. Is this how many find meaning to their lives? Apparently it seems to be. Week in week out. Wednesdays, Fridays, Saturdays.

Surely, there's greater meaning to life? And I'm glad for me, in Christ I've found it. But its sad to witness so much meaninglessness. Light of this world, pls shine into the darkness. Open our eyes, let us see.

Overheard

2006-05-08T19:30:00.000+08:00

Overheard.

'Sylvia Lim, we LOVE you!!!', crowds screaming at rally.

Sylvia smiled. 'There there.. hold it there. If its 1 or 2 of you, maybe I can handle. But I can't cope if there's 10-20...!'

*grinz*

Note: This entry is in no sense political. Its a joke. Any resemblance to any event or person, real or imagined, is not exactly deeply regretted - its all meant in good humour. Picture from sgrally.blogspot.com

Oh can I feel for this...

2006-05-07T01:07:00.000+08:00

Ohhhh.. I can so identify with this.

Below is a segment from an email my friend H wrote to me. I can so totally identify with how H is feeling, its like a complete echo of my thoughts. I can only pray that the mind of Christ my saviour live in H, and in me, from day to day, in all that we do. May we not take our eyes off him in anything - guide us down the narrow way, Lord. We're weak and foolish, only your light may guide.

'I have not lost my faith in God, nor have I become angry with Him. But I have discovered that idols can be found in the most unexpected places. And many things can be mistaken for the one true God. I have always been a very goal-directed person, and often set myself targets and objectives to meet. Many of times these goals may even be well-intentioned, e.g. serving one's master faithfully, serving others, denying oneself. But goals, like laws, well-intentioned, or malign, without Christ they can only lead to sin and death. And so the narrow way is narrow indeed. There is only one hope and one aim, and to take one's eyes off it for any proxy will lead to waywardness. For to obey any "law" in and of itself, for the slightest moment forgetting to take hold of Christ, is to use the law to take hold of self. And all over again, we destroy the covenant with the golden calf.'

2006-05-05T07:28:00.000+08:00

Puppy Love

I spent my time on Thurs evening at Borders reading this book - Marley and Me. A big big hit in New York and America, I was curious and wanted badly to find what its all about, esp with such a cute pic of the lab retriever on the cover.

I knew it would be a good read, but never did I know I'll be so hooked and emotionally attached to it! Managing only a third of the book on Thurs evening, I returned to Borders on Friday to complete the book. And irrationally, after I had finished the book, I bought it and brought it home to savour it again. =)

The book is full of laughter and tears (I'm not kidding, you'll laugh and cry as you read it... well, I did. OK chill, I know some of you are sniggering.) on the life of a typically middle class couple, and how the incorrigible yet irresistable Marley (the dog) shared in the memories of the first 13 years of this family. The dog was hyperactive, probably abnormally neurotic, yet fiercely loyal and a pillar of support when the family needed him. He crashed through doors, chewed up the carpets, stole food and underwear - but yet took good care of the family when danger arose in the neighbourhood. He shared in the sadness of the couple during trials of miscarriage and stress - it was a particularly touching part in the book when the author described how Marley became uncharacteristically subdued and well-behaved when he sensed the family in mourning. With such a doggy, you can totally understand why the author could not bear to discipline him time and again even though he's misbehaved - a playful antic and wag of the tail and the hearts just melt. And oh man, the last few chapters detailing Marley's aging and loss is just so bittersweet and melancholically achingly sad.

If you like dogs, read this book. If you dreamt of a middle class family life (with a retriever) in Eastern America, first in a hip Florida estate when younger, and then in the Pennsylvanian countryside when slightly older, this book will make you yearn to pack your bags and jet off. Haha... Read it la. Borrow from me if you wanna. =)

Here's the synopsis:

John and Jenny were just beginning their life together. They were young and in love, with a perfect little house and not a care in the world. Then they bought home Marley, a wiggly yellow fur ball of a puppy. Life would never be the same. Marley quickly grew into a barrelling, ninety-seven pound steamroller of a Labrador retriever, a dog like no other. He crashed through screen doors, gouged through drywall, flung drool on guests, stole women's undergarments, and ate nearly everything he could get his mouth around, including couches and fine jewellery. Obedience school did no good - Marley was expelled. Neither did the tranquilisers the veterinarian prescribed for him with the admonishment, 'Don't hesitate to use these.' And yet Marley's heart was pure. Just as he joyfully refused any limits on his behaviour, his love and loyalty were boundless, too. Marley shared the couple's joy at their first pregnancy, and their heartbreak over the miscarriage. He was there when babies finally arrived and when the screams of a seventeen-year-old stabbing victim pierced the night. Unconditional love, they would learn, comes in many forms. This is the heartwarming and unforgettable story of a family in the making and the wondrously neurotic dog who taught them what really matters in life.

2006-05-05T07:21:00.000+08:00

Bought this Ella and Louis (Our Love is Here to Stay: Ella and Louis Sing Gershwin) at HMV. Was pretty pleased with myself, thinking I got a rather rare buy, esp since this compilation contains quite different songs as the Ella and Louis I've grown very familliar with.

Until I reached Borders. Where they sold the CD for a good 30% cheaper. Never again will I buy HMV... when will I learn...

Anyways.. I love Ella and Louis. =) They are worth the extra money.

Psalm 139

2006-05-03T08:16:00.000+08:00

Psalm 139

For the director of music. Of David. A psalm.

1 O LORD, you have searched me
and you know me.
2 You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.

3 You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.

4 Before a word is on my tongue
you know it completely, O LORD.

5 You hem me in—behind and before;
you have laid your hand upon me.

6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too lofty for me to attain.

7 Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?

8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, [a] you are there.

9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,

10 even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.

11 If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide me
and the light become night around me,"

12 even the darkness will not be dark to you;
the night will shine like the day,
for darkness is as light to you.

13 For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother's womb.

14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.

15 My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,

16 your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be.

17 How precious to [b] me are your thoughts, O God!
How vast is the sum of them!

18 Were I to count them,
they would outnumber the grains of sand.
When I awake,
I am still with you.

19 If only you would slay the wicked, O God!
Away from me, you bloodthirsty men!

20 They speak of you with evil intent;
your adversaries misuse your name.

21 Do I not hate those who hate you, O LORD,
and abhor those who rise up against you?

22 I have nothing but hatred for them;
I count them my enemies.

23 Search me, O God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.

24 See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.

Romans 5:1-11

2006-05-01T11:19:00.000+08:00

Romans 5:5 And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.

I am tired. . .

I have been trying, really trying, in my Christian life to live his way, to act wisely according to His words, in step with the Spirit and remembering His love.

Everything seemed right. I thought I made decisions by His guidance.

But again and again I stumble, and in hindsight realize my folly and my non-wisdom.

The lessons are tough, and I have to admit I am weary. Only in hindsight do I learn, I need courage to step forward.

What I do now, would I regret in days to come?

I am tired. I am very tired.

Just pray for me, friends reading this blog. I will bounce back, I know I would, I remember clearly how He has always been faithful. But right now, I am just so tired. Again.

I need to run away from the shadows of my past, and focus + look forward to building my identity in Christ alone. To be contented to rejoice in the hope of the glory of God.

Lessons learnt are invaluable, painful tough sometimes miserable. Guard me from resentment, but that I will truly take heart in Romans 5:1-11.

Peace and joy.

Justified by faith. Peace with God.

Hope. Perseverance. Character. Hope.

But wherein lies the hope?

Powerless. Ungodly. Sinner. Enemy. Me.

But just at right time.

Justified by blood. Reconciled. Reconciled!

Saved, new life.

Rejoice. Rejoice!

Prayers valued, thanks.

2006-04-27T16:47:00.000+08:00

Who Am I?

(::VALJEAN::)
He thinks that man is me
He knew him at a glance!
That stranger he has found
This man could be my chance!

Why should I save his hide?
Why should I right this wrong
When I have come so far
And struggled for so long?

If I speak, I am condemned.
If I stay silent, I am damned!

I am the master of hundreds of workers.
They all look to me.
How can I abandon them?
How would they live
If I am not free?

If I speak, I am condemned.
If I stay silent, I am damned!

Who am I?
Can I condemn this man to slavery
Pretend I do not feel his agony
This innocent who bears my face
Who goes to judgement in my place
Who am I?
Can I conceal myself for evermore?
Pretend I'm not the man I was before?
And must my name until I die
Be no more than an alibi?
Must I lie?
How can I ever face my fellow men?
How can I ever face myself again?
My soul belongs to God, I know
I made that bargain long ago
He gave me hope when hope was gone
He gave me strength to journey on

Who am I? Who am I?
I am Jean Valjean!

And so Javert, you see it's true
That man bears no more guilt than you!
Who am I?
24601!

2006-04-24T19:24:00.000+08:00

FANTINE

Come with me
Where chains will never bind you
All your grief
At last, at last behind you
Lord in Heaven
Look down on him in mercy.

VALJEAN

Forgive me all my trespasses
And take me to your glory.

VALJEAN, FANTINE, EPONINE

Take my hand
And lead me to salvation
Take my love
For love is everlasting
And remember
The truth that once was spoken
To love another person
Is to see the face of God.

Les Miserables

2006-04-22T12:08:00.000+08:00

LES MISERABLES

Beautiful lyrics from the finale of Les Mis, my fave fave fave musical of all time, even before I became a Christian. Note the steadfast hope and confidence the song conveys of the salvation we have in the Lord, and Valjean's genuine surrender of his life and sinful self to Him.

I struggle to be like him (Valjean / Christ --> pick one. both applies. haha!)

(one gripe... the song emphasizes a lil too much on human effort in the end (cf 'will you join in our crusade'), and no mention of Christ's work to set us free (but of cos, its a 'secular' musical). There's nothing we can do by ourselves to gain righteousness before God. And I think Valjean's example in his story over the whole musical shows it well. Its nothing that he did - its all that he surrended to Him).

VALJEAN (to COSETTE)
Now you are here
Again beside me
Nw I can die in peace
For now my life is blessed...

COSETTE
You will live, Papa, you're going to live
It's too soon, too soon to say goodbye!

VALJEAN
Yes, Cosette, forbid me now to die
I'll obey
I will try.
On this page
I write my last confession
Read it well
When I, at last, am sleeping
It's a story
Of those who always loved you
Your mother gave her life for you
Then gave you to my keeping.

FANTINE
Come with me
Where chains will never bind you
All your grief
At last, at last behind you
Lord in Heaven
Look down on him in mercy.

VALJEAN
Forgive me all my trespasses
And take me to your glory.

VALJEAN, FANTINE, EPONINE
Take my hand
And lead me to salvation
Take my love
For love is everlasting
And remember
The truth that once was spoken
To love another person
Is to see the face of God.

CHORUS
Do you hear the people sing
Lost in the valley of the night?
It is the music of a people
Who are climbing to the light.

For the wretched of the earth
There is a flame that never dies.
Even the darkest night will end
And the sun will rise.

They will live again in freedom
In the garden of the Lord.
They will walk behind the plough-share,
They will put away the sword.
The chain will be broken
And all men will have their reward.

Will you join in our crusade?
Who will be strong and stand with me?
Somewhere beyond the barricade
Is there a world you long to see?

Do you hear the people sing?
Say, do you hear the distant drums?
It is the future that they bring
When tomorrow comes!

Will you join in our crusade?
Who will be strong and stand with me?
Somewhere beyond the barricade
Is there a world you long to see?

Do you hear the people sing?
Say, do you hear the distant drums?
It is the future that they bring
When tomorrow comes...
Tomorrow comes!

In Christ Alone

2006-04-22T09:56:00.000+08:00

In Christ alone will I glory
Though I could pride myself in battles won
For I’ve been blessed beyond measure
And by His strength alone I’ll overcome
Oh, I could stop and count successes like diamonds in my hands
But those trophies could not equal to the grace by which I stand

Chorus:
In Christ alone
I place my trust
And find my glory in the power of the cross
In every victory
Let it be said of me
My source of strength
My source of hope
Is Christ alone

In Christ alone do I glory
For only by His grace I am redeemed
For only His tender mercy
Could reach beyond my weakness to my need
And now I seek no greater honor in just to know Him more
And to count my gains but losses to the glory of my Lord

2006-03-30T23:23:00.000+08:00

Easter Evangelism Flyer...flyer designs all thanks to Ruth. =)

No Fear!

2006-03-18T11:00:00.000+08:00

A short 5 minutes talk I wrote on Isaiah 51:12-16. Please feel free to drop comments! =)

NO FEAR!

If I were to give a title to a short talk I might give on this passage (Isaiah 51:12-16), it’d be titled ‘No Fear!’ You know, there’s a line of streetwear quite popular which says ‘No Fear’? The one with the big staring eyes? The message here is the same. The key message in Isaiah 51:12-16 is one of comfort, strength and assurance. To those who pursuit righteousness, who listens to God, who seeks the Lord – there is no reason to fear.

Chapter 51 sits in the middle of a section in Isaiah that speaks of comfort and hope there is in God’s promised deliverance of His exiled nation. Now, its easy to trust God when the going is easy, but if you flip through the earlier chapters you will see that the situation of this nation in exile is pretty desperate. In Isaiah 40:27 for example, you see people crying out that they feel deserted by God, that they are tempted to charge him of unfaithfulness as they suffer. They fear in their present circumstance, and cannot bring themselves to trust fully in Him.

And that is the issue being addressed here in Isaiah 51. It is a message of comfort and assurance to these who are suffering in captivity and exile. Verses 1-3 remind us of God’s faithfulness since Abraham’s time, while v.9-11 invokes past redemptive acts of God as a source of comfort. As we progress to v.12-16, the passage reminds us the folly of man to be fearing in their circumstances. To fear is to show a lack of trust, to actually show disbelief in Him who offers comfort and hope.

Look at v.12. It’s a message of comfort and rebuke rolled into one. The recurring theme is that God is the one who brings comfort. So if you trust in that, there should be no reason why you’d continue in your fear of men, mortal men who will die away. Unlike the word of God which stands forever, (as Isaiah 40:6 puts it), men are like grass which will wither away. Its very myopic to fear something that is so short-term as compared to our eternal God, but isn’t it men’s tendency to be fearing other men in face of persecution or when the going gets tough?

V.13 clearly shows that the situation of this nation in exile is far from comfy – they are faced with the fury of their oppressors who are bent on destruction. But the underlying question posed here is: does that give them reason to be living in constant fear? The argument here is that the only reason why they might fear is because they have forgotten the power of the Lord of creation, the one who stretched out the heavens and laid the foundations of the earth. It asks there: For where is the wrath of the oppressors? The answer in v14 is that God will take it away! God will free them from the oppression. Isn’t the maker God more powerful to save rather than to allow what he made to be destroyed? We often minimize the power of God, as if the world didn’t belong to Him and He didn’t have the power. But these verses tell us, we ought to have confidence in Him, in His commitment to his creation, the work of his own hand.

And we see a magnificent evidence of this in v.15, a reminder of God’s mighty act of salvation mercy to his people in the parting of the Red sea. It doesn’t say that in v.15, but the churning of the seas and the roaring of the waves, it is most likely the Exodus incident it is referring to, esp as you read it with 51:10. Now think about it, if the Maker God can part the red sea, and save His people then, can he not deal with the oppressors now and set his captive people free? Will he not provide, as he promises in v14, that they will not lack bread?

The call in v16 is for the exiled nation to be trusting in His words, in His protection, as he has promised them. The words ‘You are my people’ at the end of v16, will surely remind these people of the covenantal language that the LORD has used since Mosaic times. As surely as He has created the heavens and the earth – so would He be faithful to His covenantal promises. The issue is not so much that God is unable to ransom his captive people, as some of these exiled may charge, but really, the issue is – as His people, do they really trust Him? If so, why do they still fear?

There is no fear, these verses say. There is nothing to fear. Fear paralyses us, fear casts doubts in us about His faithfulness. The Maker God will bring comfort to His people, and there is absolute solid ground for this security. Its interesting to note that this passage sits in between a few of the most famous Servants songs in the book of Isaiah. These servant songs remind us that in the Suffering Servant, whom we now know is Jesus Christ, we would have ultimate comfort and redemption. There is nothing to fear and we are to trust in Him. In the words of the Apostle Paul, if He is for us, who can be against us?

Its been some time!

2006-03-06T19:29:00.000+08:00

Its been some time!

Have been quite overwhelmed with work at NS, and being pretty occupied too with PUNJ and ministry, I've been (trying) to devote more time to sweet Jo and my lovely family. Hence the long absence.

Lemme just update a little about what's been going on in my life. It all turned upside down when I was activated to be ops-manning for the state funeral of our late DPM Rajaratnam. What a hectic rush that was! I went through almost 44 hours without sleep at the beginning of the Ops, and survived on a total of about 10 hours of sleep in those 4 days. It was so overwhelmingly busy that I didn't have time to pause and reflect the passing away of Rajaratnam until after the funeral. Its odd always to be reflecting on the death of a great man. Yes, he's done much for Singapore, and his character & achievements deserves much recognition and rememberance. Yet, what are we in God's eyes? How is greatness measured by God? Not what we have done, or what we have achieved, but rather, a humble and contrite heart willing to admit that one is a sinner and that only Jesus can save. And thus, its always with sadness I remember such passing aways. Half-mast flags, multiple VIP visits, Esplanade eulogies, gun-carriage farewell... don't they all count for nought? A great Singaporean citizen through and through - but how about citizenship in the kingdom that really matters?

Anyways, that's a couple of weeks ago. Following on, I've been busy with catching up all the back-log of ministry, and more importantly, personal relationships and my own relationship with God. Not great I must say, as I stumbled my way through. But through struggles come a deeper appreciation of His grace and complete work in Christ - don't you just simply adoreeeeeeeee Him!

Ministry wise, there's much happening, both ongoing and akan datang. Been to a couple of John studies at Jo's church, its real good! I love studying the gospels, and its just so fantastic to be relishing Jesus' life and His words once again. To be doing this with a bunch of super-enthusiastic and genuine-hearted Christians, what bliss! :)

Up soon is Easter in a month, must utilize this opportunity to get PUNJers and myself spreading the evangel! Evangelism Committee in PUNJ, you hear me??? Ideas Ideas?

Project Timothy (www.projecttimothy.com) have got loads upcoming as well, with David Jackman's visit in less than a week. The PT workshops every Monday morning promises to be a good time exploring and learning how to appreciate, study and teach His word more, while the Ministry Matters weekend should prove helpful once again to clear doubts and convict myself in the service of his kingdom. Evening expositions at ORPC on the book of Jonah is a real tempter too, esp since its sited at Jo's church grounds, and it ain't too far away from home. Together with the opportunity to be learning much from David first-hand, March promises to be an exciting month ahead! Pray for wisdom in how I use my time, but I must say I'm genuinely excited! :) Just a few weeks ago, I was actually pretty stressed abt this whole congestion of schedules, but now, I'm just so excited its around the corner. :)

Anyway, its not all ministry and no rest. Coming up from 23-26th March is a trip to Shanghai with my parents, to celebrate my dad's retirement. JUNICE, here i come to visit! And Yay! I get to fly again!! :) I miss flights, esp long haul ones, esp those 13.5 hours ones to UK. But sighhhh.. Sorry Weijian, Jon, Wynn, Hsueh, Kon Yew, Aneirin, all at Oxford Ebbes, Jingkai and all at London... I can't do UK this year. :( Yes, its with lots of sadness as I say this, for I really really wanna visit. My heart so yearns to be at that gloomy grey place once again! But turns out I can hardly take time out with leave, esp with an unexpected turn of events... I'm going to disrupt from army again to go into NIE.

Yeap, just received news from PSC and MOE that they will apply to MINDEF for me to disrupt again come July to go into NIE early. Which is really good as I can finally start earning an income and support my family, pay for bills, save up for the future and be a more 'normal' 25 yr old MAN. But I badly wanna visit UK still - next year k dudes? Weijian I know you'll be back, and prob Wynn (?) and some others as well, but the rest, wait for me k??

Phillipians 1:3-6

I thank my God every time I remember you. In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.

2006-02-20T20:54:00.000+08:00

Matthew 6:1 'Be careful not to do your acts of righteousness before men, to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven.'

Do I give, of my money, time and effort, simply to be seen?
Do I pray enough in secret, between me and Him, or do I do it simply to be heard?
Do I labour in the gospel because I delight in it, or simpy to be admired?

Hypocrisy - perhaps the greatest struggle in my Christian life. As I search my heart, too many things I do are motivated not by what Christ has done, but rather by what others view of me. Vanity, pride and the exaltation of the self - too often the preoccupation of this sinful man.

What kept me going when I first professed my faith in Christ at Ebbes? Genuine gratitude and repentfulness, or is it the accolades of others encouraged and inspired by my 'growth' in Him?

On my return to Singapore, what kept me going in service and ministry? A true heart for His people, or a secret desire to be admired and praised?

'For where my treasure is, there my heart will be also.'

Do I live for the reward promised by God that is stored as treasures in heaven, or do I live for the moment? Do I seek his approval of my living, or the accolades of men?

God is faithful, His promises are eternal and His character faithful. Lord, teach me to be totally dependent and sufficient in you, and in nothing else. You see what is done in secret, and you'll reward us accordingly (Matthew 6:4,6,18). What a claim! Teach me to trust in your words, and in your salvation at the cross that leaves us in no doubt whatsoever of your perfect character: justice, mercy and faithfulness. As you are perfect, teach us, and mould us to be perfect. (Matthew 5:48) Not just APPEAR to be perfect, but throroughly and completely cleansed of hypocrisy and guilt, inside out, and outside in.

Hopefully this blog will provide a window to all about what I truly struggle with, and who I truly am. There's a certain comfort in the seemingly 'anonymous' nature of blogs that allows one to bare much, without the incriminating feeling of being scrutinised and judged. But judge I must - not of others, but myself (Matthew 7:1). Truth and actions must match - friends, bros and sisters, hold me accountable. =)

Movies I wanna watch... Love Brit.

2006-02-18T09:25:00.000+08:00

Movies I wanna watch... Love Brit.

It being the Oscar season, there's so many movies I wanna watch. Some of this year's picks looks really exciting, including (in some order of preference, but take it with liberal doses of salt):

Constant Gardener
Matchpoint
Brokeback Mountain
Syriana

Can I just say that I'm really glad to see the resurgence of British movies? I love British productions, for their dark wit, their realism, their ponderous view of issues and life, for the sarcasm at times of themselves. The lovey biggies aside (e.g. Four Weddings, Bridget Jones, Notting Hill, Love Actually and all things Hugh Grant), there are also the darker stuff like Trainspotting, Clockwork Orange, 28days later. Brit animations e.g. Wallace and Gromit, and films with a social commentary, including Millions, Full Monty, Bend it like Beckham and Billy Elliot. Irrevelant wit in stuff like Monty Python, and finally, period dramas or literary (whether traditional, or spunky contemporary remakes) stuff from this great cultural cauldron, films like Great Expectations, Shakespeare in Love and more recently Pride and Prejudice.

There's just something so 'Brit' in these films. A mirror of their rich history and culture, yet a reflection too of the societal upheavals within this land coming to terms with modernity. Can't cope? Adopt dark introspective wit. Brilliant.

And for that reason, I'm glad to put The Constant Gardener and Matchpoint high on my 'to-watch' list. Way to go, Brit!

Oh as a side, those who know me will know I'm a sucker for foreign films. For their refreshing insights into an entirely different and unique culture, for their creative plots and methods not dictated by the Hollywood machine. I'm not a big fan of Hollywood, though some gems come out of it once in a while. But more often than not, u get slapstick comedies, e.g. of the Ben Stiller mode, that I simply cannot tahan. I know its just entertainment, but sorry, I'm just not amused. High-browed and arrogant you say? Maybe... but there's just so many gems out there to watch, why subject precious hours of my life to stuff like that?

Oh I lose myself. Foreign films. Hidden, showing at Cathay Orchard, sounds AWESOME. Watch with me, anyone?

Pride and Reluctancy

2006-02-12T12:43:00.000+08:00

Pride And Reluctancy

Was at L+G's on Friday to catch up, and to be praying as accountability partners in the gospel. It was a really good time in sharing, and it made me realize once again how fantastic it is to have peers around me to be praying together, to be holding each other firm and steadfast in our faith. The Giraffe and the Mouse were there too, as was my dearest J. As the Giraffe pointed out, it was so encouraging that despite the fact that we came from 4 different physical 'churches', we were still able to be praying and sharing our lives together as one body in Christ, brothers and sisters keen to serve and live for the gospel. It was sooooo refreshing to set aside work, ministry worries, stress and whatever, to just come together and be humbled again at how dependent we are on Him, or rather ought to be. The intial aim for this monthly prayer meeting was to be holding each of us, all of whom are keen or thinking about the idea of fulltime ministry, accountable and encouraged despite and in spite of all the discouragements that we may experience in work and in ministry. It turn out to be a great night (for me at least) in exposing my own hypocrisy. For who am I to be thinking of fulltime, as if its some sacred endgoal of being a 'good' christian, if I'm not even serious or doing well in my daily living for Him?

Its been a whirlwind of a year (and more) since I've been back to Singapore. Plunging deep into 'ministry' in PUNJ, often the predominant concerns I have were questions like 'Have I prepared my bible study well? Are my questions sharp enough? Did I understand the text enough? Did I convey the main idea of the text well?', or 'I wonder whether I should do 1-2-1 with this punjer...', 'Why is this brother not in chuch today? Maybe I should call to check on him..', 'What else can I be doing for my PUNJ group?'. Too often, a task-oriented approach is taken towards ministry, and it was good to re-examine my motivations again on Friday. It was a timely break for some self-reflection about my own walk with Christ - have I been compromising on my own personal holiness in the name of 'ministry'?

Behind the whole facade of someone who's seem always to be busy and tired out by work, ministry and relationships with dear ones, is a sinner who too often let pride and a joyless reluctancy to serve Christ take over
Him. L shared a devotion on the 'Reluctant Prophet' from Exodus 3-4 on Friday - and how apt! At the heart of it all was a lack of trust from Moses in the LORD's sovereignty and faithfulness, and a lack of dependency on Him and his plans. For us right now, we may seem to be actively involved in ministry - but are we truly in it with a heart of joy and of keen servanthood, or do we plod on with a lethargy that betray our own selfish motivations in 'ministry'? Am I seeking more the praises of man as I teach in PUNJ, or do I do it expecting some brownie points that I can score to gain favour with God? Am I depending and concentrating too much on my own abilities, that I lose sight of the work he has already completed on the cross?

It was refreshing (in some warped way) to hear from the others that we all share the same struggle. Which is why again the prayer meeting on Friday was so helpful. To pull ourselves back again, to pause and just be reflecting and considering the example of our Christ Jesus as we pray in love for one another. (cf Phillipians 2) 'Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humilty consider others better than yourselves.' Let's continue to work out our salvation in fear and trembling, with no hint of self-conceit and pride but to depend on Him always, for 'it is God who works in us to will and to act according to his good purpose'. Instead of lethargy, let's be 'doing everything without complaining or arguing, so that we may become blamess and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which we shine like stars in the universe as we hold out the word of life.' As we toil in ministry, let's be doing it with a glad and rejoicing heart, never forgetting the priority in our own personal living.

Pride and reluctancy, get away from me. =)

Hermitage (Moscow, Russia)

2006-02-05T11:44:00.000+08:00

Hermitage (Moscow) at Sunset
Originally uploaded by keeevin.

Just another sunset picture for prosperity's sake. =) I like this picture a lot really. You may not feel it from looking at the pic (sunset pics have a knack of distorting warmth/cool feelings), but it was absolutely freezing in Russia. I was all covered up, turtleneck, leather jacket, beanie and all... but still, my cheeks were so frozen it actually hurt. Ouch.

Leaning Tower of Pisa

2006-02-05T11:37:00.000+08:00

Leaning Tower of Pisa
Originally uploaded by keeevin.

Dead tired by the end of a blistering hot day in Italy. Travelled some distance to arrive at Pisa, which have practically nothing except for the leaning tower. Oh, picture taken at sunset too. =)

Paris sunset

2006-02-05T11:32:00.000+08:00

Paris sunset
Originally uploaded by keeevin.

Continuing the theme of sunsets (my fave time of the day?), here's one of Paris. It was absolutely chilly, but the pretty sight made up for it all. What you don't see is all the dog poo lying around everywhere in Paris...

Clouds over Table Mountain (Cape Town)

2006-02-05T11:31:00.000+08:00

Clouds over Table Mountain
Originally uploaded by keeevin.

Quite positively the most beautiful place I've ever been to. It was simply breathtaking. Went up the mountain thinking that its probably the same as just about any other, but astounded by nature's beauty as sunset approaches. The clouds simply POURED over the flat plateau (like a tablecloth over a dining table), crawling towards our direction. Amazing.

King's College1

2006-02-04T09:17:00.000+08:00

King's College1
Originally uploaded by keeevin.

One of my fave photos - sunset at King's College, Cambridge. Taken in my first year in UK. No wonder I miss UK... though decidedly more Oxford than Cambridge, haha!

First Post!

2006-02-02T11:40:00.000+08:00

After a supremely long while, I've finally decided to get a half decent blog of mine going. Many reasons why I've been playing with this idea. Firstly, and very hopefully, this will be a platform to share with those who know me things that are going on in my life. Especially since I know myself to be quite hopeless in keeping those who are dear to me in the loop of what's going on in my life. Hopefully things will get better with this blog...

Secondly, I often have lots of random thoughts going on in my head, much of it insights on my Lord Jesus Christ, thoughts that I always wanted to share with others, but never really did so. Hopefully what I share in this blog will serve as a good encouragement to my bro-and-sis in Christ, or it will lead others to question why Jesus is so important to me.

Thirdly, by sharing my life on this platform, hopefully it'll be helpful to those dear to me in holding me accountable in my walk with Christ.

Lastly, I'm quite a nolstalgic person. I hold on to memories lots. Much of it will just slip away if I don't record it somewhere, and hopefully this blog will be a key to me savouring / appreciating God's goodness to me.

On that note.. I shall begin with uploading some of my fave pics from my travels over the last few years. =) Beginning with one that I especially like.. me pouring water over my unsuspecting mum as we trekked through Ireland. Beautiful.

Naughty keeev in ireland. Bliss.